This sounds like something very much that the Elves would sing, or maybe an Elvish-like Hobbit! ((Anyone we know? Teehee.)) Anyway this is a very good poem - I won't point out the spelling mistakes as some authors have done that already, all I have to say is one word - graceful. Oh, and flowing, And Elvish. Oh, that's three. Never mind. Well done!
Author's Response: I had Lothlorien in mind while writing this, so maybe Celeborn, Galadriel, or Haldir. Of course, it could be Merry, too, but I rather think it was an elf writing this. :) Thanks on all three counts, I appreciate the comments. NZ
Wow, that was a lot of exclamation marks! I think your rhyme scheme was well done; it came across very naturally. I couldn't figure out the cadence though perhaps that was due to the exclamation marks. I'm not sure.
I have to query the inclusion of Elbereth as a high elf though - the Valar and the Elves are /very/ different.
To address spelling briefly:
Iluvatar (one l only)
Gilthoniel (You lost the first l. Gil is Sindarin for star; Gilthoniel means star hanger.
Despite my nitpicks I liked this: I think you have got the spirit of this poem right.
Author's Response: Thanks for the spelling corrections - always appreciated. I'm sorry if the exclamation marks bothered you. This was one of my first attempts at (sarcasm) high poetry. I think what was going through my head was that the poem was praising the High Elves as well as what they praised. Thank you for the review, and have fun reading! NZ
Whoa. That was actually really freaky. I think that's exactly how he felt and what he saw. That was good. Gave me goosebumps.
Author's Response: That's high praise, my thanks. It's always surprised me that people don't think much about Gollum's struggle with the Ring, besides the whole 'love/hate' relationship. NZ
I liked this very much. It is like a beginning of some lay of the last Elves in Middle-Earth. This is quite an atmospheric poem.
Author's Response: Thank you. It was written on the way back from visiting relatives: We were flying over some beautiful mountains into the sunset, and were low enough to see campgrounds and the such. While it doesn't sound very inspiring, something about that image gave off a little spark. NZ
It sounds as if you thought this one up while spending a sunny afternoon picnicking in a clovery meadow on the Pelennor. Nice poem!
Author's Response: Well, that comes part-way true. I wrote the first part at night and there were these wonderful cumulostratus clouds that had breaks that you could just see the full moon and stars through. It then fermented in my mind, and I thought of the rest while on a bike ride. Thank you for the thoughts! NZ
Well, I'll tell you how I feel!
I truly like this, because it is written from the perspective of the '' Axis '' rather than the ''Allies '' .
There is some fanfic written from the viewpoint of the * other side * , but not a great deal. I suppose that is because we can only * guess * at the cultures [ I always write the northern Haradhrim as rather Ottoman ], whereas we feel we know the people of Gondor, and Rohan and the Elves much better and feels more familiar to write in.
Harad, Rhun etc are unknown territory, and after reading the Pelennor in the book, you do tend to cheer when the Axis are soundly trounced, ditto with the film.
But we forget, though these Men are called Men of the Darkness, they had families and wives [ perhaps more than one ] and still could love and live and be mourned.
Excellent idea, love it!
Author's Response: Thank you! Two nights ago there was a lunar eclipse, and I felt kind of sad about it, and the line "the music died that day" with various themes about next line. Anyway, this poem came out, and I really like it (if I do say so myself). I've always thought of the Easterlings as vaguely Ottoman, but I can see how the Haradrim might be considered that way. ( If the Haradrim are Ottoman, are the Mumak riders the Janissaries?) Once again, thank you for the nice review. NZ
That was really good! You are really good at writeing poems........*pout* It's not fair...........O WELL!
Author's Response: Thank you! You might be surprised to know that I can't write poems worth two cents that are non-ME related. . . They say you need to write about what you know. . . NZrn
that was............. kinda sad................................it sounds like something my best friend would write!
Author's Response: Really? This was a foray into the post modernist poetry for me. . . I'm still not sure if I like it or not! NZ
I love the way you recreate your first poem as a parody here. *claps* I think the last two lines of both poems are the best: the repetition really works.
Author's Response: Thank you! When I wrote the first one, I felt that it was so melodramatic that it was just begging for a sequel. 8-)
A beautiful ode to Three Graces of Arda.
Author's Response: You know, I was wondering if you'd notice this one. It was the first one I wrote, and it took me a while to get up the courage to post it online. 8-) NZ
You have a wonderfully wild outlook in this poem. Once again, I ask, how did you get so good?
Author's Response: I was trying to capture the earthy feel I get every time I read about Shadowfax. I think the movie did it horrible wrong to have Shadowfax be an Arabian, he is just so much more powerful than a slighty wimpy show-horse. Once again, I say, I write what I know about. NZ
I had shivers going down my back with that one.
When I read this, I see a golden sunset, with people around a fire being very pensive and serious.
Author's Response: That sounds a lot like the image I have, except mine is when the people are sitting at a campfire looking at the stars, and the sun has just gone down. NZ
Creepy! How do you write poetry so well?
Author's Response: Well, I write horrible poetry having to do with Mild Earth, a.k.a. reality. They say that to write good poetry, you have to write about what you are passionate about, and I guess I just know more about Middle Earth than about Mild Earth. NZ
This is so bittersweet, and sad! I want to cry! The elves have left, and the Pool is trying to bring them back!
Author's Response: Well, I didn't have it in mind that the Pool was trying to bring the Elves back, as the Pool isn't exactly alive, but I did start crying when I was writing this. NZ