i absolutely adore your writing :) twas so perfectly descriptive but not boringly so. Also i am completely ecstatic to find someone capable of using proper grammar in their writing, despite it being uploaded online :) please continue writing, as u have an avid reader in me :) i will check back regularly for updates.
when the messenger asked for a girl, he did not specify clearly who. other than that it's really good.
Author's Response: Ambellina was the only Sprite, at that time, being trained for battle. So, technically, he did specify that she was who Sauron wanted. :) Thanks!
Okay, as some-one whose '' Muse '' [ one of them, lol ] is Sauron's son, I allowed Vanimórė to read this. Rather, he insisted. I try always to stick as close to canon as a story will go, and dislike other races being used - although there's a bit of an '' unknown '' with Goldberry, the Daughter of the River '' whom, broadly could be some sort of water nymph [ Maia ]. But I like your writing style very much, it is nicely constructed and is not stilted or compacted. As a general rule of thumb, I never '' buy '' the female/warrior assasin, not in Tolkien's universe, save for the very rare exception,s Haleth and Eowyn. But reading it as a story, if I was not so steeped in 20 years of Tolkien, I find it a good read, which is what it's all about on an FF site. From Vanimórė's point of view, Sauron would be a lot more evil and probably have her himself, if she was pretty. Sauron is capable of every evil, after all, his Master, Morgoth was the ultimate evil. Nothing was beyond him or Sauron. But if this is your first FF? You show a lot of promise in your writing style. if there really had been sprites, and really a son of Sauron, I would have Vanimórė go and talk to her ;) and say words to the effect of; '' tell him to stick it. '' ;)
Author's Response: I promise, this is my first one. The way I thought of it, actually, was because of a song, and I wasn't too keen on sticking another race in there, either, but I tried hard not to make her a mary sue, as you'll see as we move more into the story. I just couldn't see Sauron thinking of her in that way, for any reason. I kind of don't see Sauron as a man, but as the embodiment of evil, so I couldn't justify that to myself. And I thank you so much for your review. :) It's always nice to get critique.