I am glad I could give you a nudge! :) I know it must be difficult, almost impossible with your workload, but perhaps it would also be quite relaxing for you to write something that is not part of your course. I hope so :)
Author's Response: It really is...I'm working on All Our Yesterdays now. The ball has begun rolling once again :) thank you, Sîan.
Oh!! How can you leave it like that?
I am glad you still have time to work on this, Narya!
Author's Response: I realised when I read your Van/Maglor fic this morning that I really, really missed writing my fanfic. Once I finished Second Chance I sort of got out of the swing of these stories...so now I'm trying to get back into it again. Thanks for your readership and support, as always. Hugs.
I'm very happy to see an update to this story, I simply fell in love with the three and am quite curious what will happen to them.
I liked the chapter very much, Haddan is very attentive to Leo's reactions. I hope he can reach out to his friend and show him a way to be free from the influence of his father. From the chapter I think Leo would be quite happy in such an apprenticeship but has those ideas his stupid father planted in his mind about being a "real man".
Author's Response: I shall do - keep your eyes peeled over the next couple of days ;) I'm NaNoing at the moment, but this makes a nice break, and I've got lots of ideas bubbling. Thanks again for following and reviewing!
A great scene, it was touching and foreboding. It's great how you subtly shift the relationship between these three. I hope Leo's not up to something stupid?
I wonder if at least Haddan will speak about those confusing thoughts and feelings with Berthe, though I fear he won't. I guess it's difficult for them - feeling for each other like brothers but not being brothers and now those new feelings while touching (what I think was perfectly normal for them before). And Filwyn who is still too young to truly understand but cannot keep her mouth shut.
I really like your exploration of these three and hope you will update soon.
Author's Response: Oh, thank you for such a lovely, in-depth review! I'm really glad you're enjoying it :) the shifting of the relationships between them isn't necessarily planned; it's just what feels right when I'm writing. The story's already gone wandering off in a direction I didn't think it would take. Thanks again for R&Ring, as always!
I think that Haddan and Leofwyne are going to be an adorable couple. Hopefully Filwyn doesn't have a crush on Leofwyne...that could be bad.
How will she react when she figures them out?
From one sad story/chapter to another! Just came from reading the latest chapter of "Second Chance". This chapter brought tears to my eyes. Poor Leofwyne.
Author's Response: I know, bless him. He's possibly my favourite out of the three, although I do seem to keep heaping misery on him...ah well. No story without conflict :) I'm glad it made you cry - well, not glad, but, y'know. Glad it produced a reaction. Thank you for the review!
Not originally how I thought this scene was going to play out, but hey. What do you think?
I love it. This is so tender and young, and beautiful.
Leofwyne’s shaking fingers trailed along the delicate shape of his ear and across his jaw to his lips – and then they were withdrawn, leaving a cool gap like a bruise on his skin.
Works for me :D
Author's Response: Glad to hear it! :D they've a long way to go yet - they're only 13, after all. Thanks for following and reviewing!!
Oh, I am late, I was battling the dreaded lurgy.
I am so pleased you have added to this chapter, I really love this immersion into Rohan and these people.
I am extremely glad for Leofwyne - and as for his mother, I do realize it was harder in that society to leave a husband than it is now; I am sorry for her, but she was offered a place.
Author's Response: Thank you!! And don't worry about it :) just glad you're still enjoying. Hope your lurgy is better.
It's nice to see you pick up this story. I like it very much, especially the close friendship between the three children.
I'm very relieved to see Leo safe - if there won't be a problem with his father coming. But I'm wondering a bit how Berthe manages to care for the children on her own? I take it, money is no problem for her?
Author's Response: Money is not a huge problem, no; as well as receiving the Rohirric equivalent of a war widow's pension, Berthe is in fact a seamstress, so she earns her own living, though obviously I've neglected to mention it in the actual story. Problem will be rectified ASAP :) thank you for reading and reviewing!
What a fascinating yet heartbreaking chapter, well done! The exchange between the woman was perfectly terse and very natural, I could definately sense Aedre's fear and I felt very conflincted about her character in that I feel pity for her yet also I cannot believe she would abadon her son and yes I understand she is afraid but at the same time she is drowning and even when she is offered a hand out she would not take it. Ah, curse that fierce Rohirrim pride!
Very much looking forward to more of this story!
Author's Response: "Curse that fierce Rohirrim pride"...well, there's plenty more of it to come! Glad you still like it; apologies for the long hiatus, I'll try and keep up the momentum from now on :) thanks for taking the time to read and review!
Another beatifullly written and touching chapter. It is always such a treat to see this story updated as I have seriously grown so attached to each of your OC's as they are so wonderfully unique and I am throughly looking forward to being able to follow the story as they grow older and how the dynamics will change between them but for now they are really incredibly dear.
Author's Response: Aww, thank you Anwyn! I'm glad you like the characters; this story never seems to get as many hits as Trapped when I update, and I do wonder if it's to do with it being centred almost entirely around OCs (although having said that, Trapped is very OC-heavy too :s ). Anyway, yes the dynamics of the group will change as they get older; these guys are going to go through a heck of a lot before very long! I feel bad, I love them as kids, they're so innocent - with the exception of Leofwyne, who has already has some awful experiences. Ah well, no story without conflict ;-) thank you very much for your review.
As usual, your descriptions are spot on and your writing is vivid and beautiful. I really felt for the characters in this chapter, very well done!
Oooh, lovely! I have been hoping for another chapter of this story. I am really enjoying the development of these three.
There was the Haddan of the Now, holding his friend and chattering and trying to keep his spirits up, and there was the Haddan of the Then, crouching in a corner and sniffling while the two women desperately tried to keep his father’s raging fever down.
This is excellent, it is a wonderful description of what Haddan is feeling, that strange dislocation of having been in that situation once before.
Thank-you so much for posting another chapter of this intriguing story.
Author's Response: And thank you for your consistently lovely reviews; I was being attacked by this scene last night, it wouldn't leave me alone! I'm really glad you enjoyed it :-)
I really like this, the chapter with dog made me cry. You're really good at bringing about empathy for characters. Good job, keep writing!
Author's Response: Thanks! Glad you like it :-) I plan to update this and Trapped within the next few days. In other business - I left you a message on LJ and I've sent you several emails but I'm not sure they're getting through; basically, my hotmail account has died. I commented on your last LJ post, leaving you an address that should work. Hope to hear from you soon!
This is turning into such a great piece of fiction. I loved that chapter, it was delicately and movingly handled.
Author's Response: :-D I'm glad you liked it! As you know, "Trapped" doesn't seem to want to be written at the moment, and when I turned back to this story it felt like it was writing itself, which was a great feeling. Thanks for your review!
Wonderfully written chapter. You know I don't read stories based around Men - well maybe your don't, but I so rarely do it's rare as hens teeth. Your characters are very interesting, though, and their growth and thoughts.
Being a dog lover, I cried :(
Please keep going :)
Author's Response: Aww! I must admit, I felt very bad killing Dog; I'm a dog lover too, and defending Leo seemed like the kind of thing a loyal dog would do. Equally, though, with his father in that mood, the consequences of Dog biting couldn't have been any different, I don't think. I so rarely do it's rare as hens teeth. XD I'm honoured that you think my story's worth reading, then! Now the Christmas chaos is over I'll probably be back to posting more often again. As ever, I appreciate the review - thank you for sharing your thoughts! Take care.
Ah, so they're growing up. :) I must admit Filwyn kicking Leofwyne in the goolies made me choke. XD .
I like the fact they're older now, I don't read stories centered around children or teenagers, unless it's a part of the story before they grow up, but I have a habit of ' beginning from the beginning ' too, so I think you're correct in starting the story in their childhood and it's very nicely done.
You do use a lot of dialogue -- the first part of this chapter contained a great deal, the last part more description and then dialogue. I can't say it bothers me. Dialogue is necessary. I prefer * thoughts * and description, but at times we have to have speech and when it's between three people or more, you either have to write it third person omniscient or third person present. I've done both, although I prefer it when it's third person present, to speak from their perspective and add more * thoughts * , not simply a back-forth of speech. It's written both ways and neither is right or wrong, so it's really what you feel you prefer, I think.
Author's Response: OK, thank you for your help!! Glad you're still liking it; they won't be kids for much longer, it's getting hard to write :p thank you for reviewing, take care
This is a delightful chapter, and sounds very true to life, Haddan's reaction to the baby, and then having him hold her was a great touch :)
Author's Response: Thanks, so happy you liked it - like I just said to Anwyn, Haddan's behaviour is simliar to mine and my brother's when we got an unexpected little sister after wishing for a brother.
At the risk of sounding like a broken record, I really like this story and I think the idea of using the prompt's to create a story around is abseloutely brilliant as every chapter you add a little more and I think the depth that you give to your character's is just wonderful and reminds me why I love reading about OC's so much, well, well written ones at least which it is definately established yours are. Poor little Haddan, I understand his disappointment well as it took me years to get over the fact that I had a younger brother and not the younger sister I had wanted and that he was it, no more siblings but the last little part was very sweet and worked with the prompt very nicely,
Author's Response: Thank you Anywyn! It's funny you should say that, actually; this chapter was partly inspired by mine and my older brother's attitudes to our new baby sister when we were 5 and 6 respectively. We used to be constantly asking our parents "When will the baby go home?" and didn't quite realise that it wasn't that simple! Glad you enjoyed it, anyway; thanks for the review.