Suuuure. Thought-shot is a term we used to use in Language Arts. The definition is…*Flipping through Language Arts binder* Ah-ha!
Thought-shot: A writer’s ability to communicate what a character is thinking and feeling at a given moment.
Hmm…comparing darkness to syrup—never seen that before. I like it. As well as the Morse-code line. V. clever. I love Brandon’s reactions. Too true. If I were him, I would scared out of my mine. Actually, I’m scared *for* him. BRANDON DEAD?! Nooo! Eerie, mellon nin, eerie.
Thanks Fei! I'll have to use that in my creative writing class next year :)
Oh, he is scared out of his mind. But as I've said before, say much else because it would give too much away. But I will say this.
It isn't neccessarily what you think.
Mwahaha. Time for some over-analysis on what I just said.
I was hoping for eerie, I'm glad I achieved it! Thanks for the review!
I will say this in a few words:
Poor Brandon I hope He will be alright! Scary chapter, you might want to start lightening the mood just a tinsey bit, you know add some of the humor parts that Merry and Pippin do in the story.
Like that! Keep up the good work!
Author's Response: Thanks for the tip! I can't say anything about it other than thank you, since that would give away what's going to happen. But thanks!
What. The. Heck. I'd use stronger language, but then I might be kicked off the review site. But still... WHAT?!?!?!??!?!! GAH! There isn't enough room in these review boxes for the amount of question marks and exclamation points that I have for this latest plot development. Anyway... keep up the good work! I EXPECT AND DEMAND A NEW CHAPTER SOON. :P
Author's Response: I told you you'd freak out, haha. A new chapter is coming, don't worry!
Oh my Elbereth... He's dead... And he has the same last name as my main character! rofl =P I wanna read more! I wanna find out if he's dead in ME as well! I don't think he is though, nuh, he isn't *gets down knees and begs* - Breia
Author's Response: He may be dead, he may not be. A new chapter WILL be out before too long. I should have something out on or by Friday. If not Friday, Saturday.
GAAAAH. HOLY. CRAP. LAST LINE = EPIC!!!!!! Write more. Like, now. :P Keep up the amazing work!
Author's Response: I don't have time to write more right NOW. But I should have something by the end of this week. You're my sister. If you want plot spoilers all you have to do is ask, silly.
Ooooo spooky. I’m trembling and shivering. Literally. I’m reading this on my computer in the basement at night, which really isn’t the best place for reading wolf attacks (Great-amazing-wonderful job on that, by the way. I’m really feeling bad for Brandon and the I’m-a-monster mania. I forgot about the wolf attack!) and Moria chapters. Really, I’m scared…and I know what happens! Reading at night in the basement does make Moria seem more…real, though. Ugh, I’m frustrated because I can’t find the right words to review with! It’s just so…so…spectacular! Book-verse but extremely entertaining—gotta love Brandon’s thought-shots. ;) Loved the “Her price was death” line, too. Keep up the GREAT work, Caller. I want mooooore!
I forgot about the wolf attack too, until I flipped to Appenix B and saw it on the timeline. :p. I agree with your whole basement thing. If I were to read a spooky/dark LOTR story in my living room (my basement is unfinished) at night, I would get freaked out.
I like writing in book-verse, at least for this story. It adds more structure. Though as far as events go, I'm going to section LOTR, (at least The Fellowship of the Ring), like Jackson did, with Boromir dying at the end of The Fellowship of the Ring instead of at the beginning of The Two Towers. I can't say anything else because it might give away some of the things at the end.
Thanks for all the compliments. I like that...'thought-shots'...can I use that?
More is coming. I should have a new chapter out by the end of this week, possibly.
Ooh, very intriguing. I love the line "Gandalf read the door". That's a good one, rather hilarious really. I know this fic is book-verse so I have to ask, is that line in the book or did you just write it? But yes, that last line "Her price was death." that is very ... threatening. I feel kinda sorry for Brandon, it'd be so hard to be going through Moria with the trilogy and not feeling able to read them to find out what happens in Moria, that would be very frustrating. Anyway, I better go, I have school *rolls eyes* =P Thanks for the great read - BreiaAuthor's Response:
Both "Gandalf read the door" and "Her price was death" are lines from me. I only look at the book for context and making sure I have certain events.
Appendix B=my best friend for life. I don't know where I would be without that timeline.
Duna Duna Dundundundundun Duh! Spooky! This chapter is full of foreshadowing, I like that! Keep up the good work!
Author's Response: I adore foreshadowing. It's kinda cool, haha. Thanks for the review!
Aww... Poor Brandon. I think something went wrong with the spacing when you posted this, it might pay to fix it up when you have a spare ten minutes. It happens to me and a whole heap of other people too so don't worry. Hope you've been well, it's been a while since I read any of this. I haven't been writing much, been busy with school and such but I only have one week left of term which is good. I might get a fair bit of writing done next week actually considering I have all combined classes... Can't wait for more as always and great job - BreiaAuthor's Response:
I think I've fixed the spacing, but I'll double check. Thanks for the notice!
I've been pretty well, and I hope school gets less busy for you. School is finally slowing down for me...the musical is over and I have SO much free time. It still takes me about two days to think/write up a new chapter for 'Walking the Line' though. During April Vacation, however, I'll probably have a creative overflow and you can probably look forward to about five new updates that week, haha.
I really hope you do write! I love your writing style and all your amazing stories!
Thanks for the review!
Very, very, VERY, good chapter! The suspense is killing me (laughs) I like suspenseful stories! Nice chapter by the way, keep up the good work!
Author's Response: Thanks Dune! I'm glad you'll keep reading. Moria will be interesting.
This is good! But what is Aragorn sensing?! 0.0 Magical bunny-rabbits with licorice whips and chocolate swords?! ... Where did that come from? Anyway, great job and I can't wait for more ^^ - BreiaAuthor's Response:
Well, if he sensed the bunny-rabbits with licorice whips and chocolate swords, then I'm not giving Aragorn's ranger senses enough credit. The bunny-rabbits are currently taking lessons from the Balrog on how to use swords and whips. Let's hope the Balrog doesn't eat them.
What Aragorn, and even Sam to some extent, are sensing is the crebain. I've been studying the first book intently, and throughout the part where the Fellowship is in Hollin, there is this sense of a choking silence that starts to creep all of them out. Turns out, the spies of Saruman have scared away most anything that would make noise. The crebain passing over Hollin alert the Fellowship that they are being watched. They make the deduction that they cannot take the route they had originally planned, and opt to go via the Redhorn gate--aka, Caradhras.
Stupid crebain! You're the real reason that Gandalf is dead!
I was wondering when Brandon would let his emotions explode. Poor Gimli, glad he didn't take it too hard, getting yelled at. Good chapter Keep up the good work!
Author's Response: Thanks!
Um, actually my story is called A Slave no More and the main character's name is big John. Please keep reading it and reviewing it. I also have another story you might like, its called the wolf, please check it out, I just updated it yesterday. Keep up the good work!
Author's Response: Oh, I'm sorry! I read the first chapter of 'A Slave no More' and then I got kicked off the computer...and when I wrote the review it was still early in the morning for me...sorry! I feel bad now. I'll make it up to you though, I'll read and review both stories! Sorry!
Question: How old is Brandon? I just randomly thought of that while I was reading... And I agree, it would be freaky to be able to read about the future, to see what happens to those around you... I love the authenticity in this too, if I tried, I could probably rewrite all of my stories and make it sound like this so good job and great chapter - Breia
Author's Response: Brandon is 17. There are hints to his age in the first few chapters, but really all that is said is that 'he is barely of age' (chapter 1) and some of the Fellowship call him 'boy' from time to time. Thanks for the review!
Whoa. Freakishly awesome nightmare/teleportation, I must say! Kudos for the creativity and cleverness on Brandon’s coffin nightmare, Caller! Honestly, you had me trembling. For a moment, I thought he was going to wake up a vampire or something. That would be random. This is getting *very* interesting. I CANNOT wait to see what happens when Brandon enters the realm of his dream/teleportations again!
Author's Response: Thanks Fei! I'm glad you liked this chapter. Judging by the feedback I've been getting, lots of people liked the 'buried alive' idea. I don't think Brandon will become a vampire, but something else that is pretty random WILL happen within the next couple of chapters...I'll let you keep reading to find out what it is. When you see it, you'll know.
Good job! Got to be careful with those books, can't let them fall into the wrong hands now can we! Keep up the good work and Keep updating! I will keep reading!
Author's Response: My updates will slow down significantly in the next few weeks...this week was February vacation so I had tons of spare time. I'll probably update once every three or four days now. I'm glad you'll keep reading! I've been reading your story about 'Big Jim' and I love it!
Anxiety and Sword Lessons Reviewer: DarkDreamer Signed
I love this story so far! Hope you update soon! :]
Author's Response: Thanks! I'll update whenever I can
It'd be fun staying up with Gandalf... And if I were being taught by Boromir, he'd be dead by now =p Pippin's joke was funny... I suppose it's a matter of perspective though, lol. Good job on writing all these chapters in such quick succession... It reminds of my younger days, lol. Good chapter, again ^L^ - Breia
Author's Response: Thanks! I kept writing in rapid succession because the ideas kept hitting me like a truck. Thousands of them keep flying in and out of my head. Sometimes this gets annoying. Other times, it's the best thing ever. Thanks for the review! I'm glad you like the story!
Good chapter, hope Brandon sleeps well, and doesn't almost die this time.(Laughs)
Author's Response: Thank you!
Ooh............... This is gonna get mega interesting now... I feel kinda sorry for Merry... Having to find Brandon like that but he's okay for now so it's all cool, can't wait for more but don't use up all your creativity at once, that's what happened to me :( It's sad and annoying, trust me. Good job though - Breia
Author's Response: That's why I have two stories going...when my creativity on one dies, I turn to the other and work on that one. It's like farming. One field is always lying fallow. Thanks for the advice though. I'm sure you haven't used up all your creativity. Someone as creative as you can't possibly be out of creativity. You just need time to "recharge" the creative part of your brain. Don't worry! Thanks for the praise and the review!