Reviews For The Price of Duty
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Reviewer: Laer Signed [Report This]
Date: 18/03/10 - 08:20 pm Title: Chapter 8

I am afraid that his little "friend" may not be such a good one. I was also worried that he might be coming home to a bad surprise. ut then he isn't home yet is he?

Author's Response: Thank-you for the reviews :D

Angadilion isn't the best influence is he lol! But he had a good soul, and I think in the end his worth and friendship will have to endure many tests, and we shall see if it holds. I hope it does for Erestor needs a true friend :(

Reviewer: Spiced Wine Signed [Report This]
Date: 17/03/10 - 01:30 pm Title: Chapter 9

Oh -- also I truly admire how you introduced the darker-skinned Avari, and showed that, as the Noldor think themselves superior to the Silvan's, some (not all) of the Silvan's feel similarly about the Avari.

There's a thin line to walk between writing Elves as angelic neuters who talk to flowers, and writing them as basically long-lived Men. The former is nothing like the true Elves of our mythology and to me, is too uninteresting to read, and the latter is, I think, rather pointless, because no-one who can (in theory) live as long as the world lasts is going to have the same mind-set as a Mortal, so it's also incorrect. A lot of authors write one or the other, but the most interesting authors write Elves as *human* but different enough (and dangerous and alien enough) to remain a separate race from Men, while not stripping them of their passions and flaws. I think you've done that here.

Also, I am very much enjoying Glorfindel's ancestry. :)

Author's Response: Wow, thank-you so much for that huge complement. I don't know if I can live up to it, or if I am really doing that good of a job at showing the more human side of elves and still balancing out their alien natures, but I am glad you think so :D

Yes, Glorfindel is fun! Sometimes I cannot wait until I've finished this story and can get on to all the other ones floating about up there, like what's going to happen when Maglor sees Glorfindel in Valinor again ;) But then I think how much I am loving writing The Price, and I just want to grab hold of it and never let it be over lol! I think I've found a freedom in my writing I didn't have with 'To be Black' I felt to pressured to write what I thought people wanted to hear, and it wasn't until the end where I really started enjoying it's writing. But some of it also had to do with Third Age writing, I love the First Age and never want to leave it!

Hugs for giving two reviews lol! Thanks Siân :D

Reviewer: Spiced Wine Signed [Report This]
Date: 17/03/10 - 11:53 am Title: Chapter 9

I really love the scenes between Erestor and the Green Elves. You have given them s separate identity to the Noldor very quickly and easily; they feel much more native and wild. I love the idea of it being normal among the Nandor to take lovers of either sex.

The ritual oath-swearing was very absorbing too; blood to bind, and the women warriors here are excellent, they sound extremely natural.

Two thoroughly engrossing chapters here, Encairion. I love the gritty richness of this; the problems with the Nandor, the roughness of their lives after the Nirnaeth Arnoediad, the pride and doubts and sexual tension and confusion are all truly well done.

Author's Response: Ah! yes two reviews from you, that made my day ;DDD

The ritual oath-swearing was very absorbing too; blood to bind

I am so glad you liked it! It developed all on its own, I was typing away when it just popped up and inserted itself, but I think it fits the green elves culture perfectly! The idea of them worshiping a mother goddess, and calling upon spirits, and blood oaths, it all just fits their more native side. I wanted a completely separate identify for the Silvian elves. Really it only makes sense that they would have little in common with the Noldor, their peoples were sundered for hundreds of years! What is the likelihood that they adopted the same style of dress ect.

I am glad you liked the chapters! Especially the sexual tensions, I almost felt like it was too much... but then I thought Erestor is about a 15 year old human, and sex is high on their mind lol! In some ways Erestor has had to mature a great deal faster then other elves his age, but in other ways, like sexuality he is behind :(

But next chapter we have another time jump, so we get to see a new side of Erestor, an full grown adult one! I can't wait to start writing *rubs hands together* lol! Thank-you again for the review :D

Reviewer: danira Signed [Report This]
Date: 15/03/10 - 07:55 pm Title: Prologue

oh okay...thats strange

Reviewer: Sieanna Signed [Report This]
Date: 13/03/10 - 12:00 am Title: Chapter 7

Great chapter once again..update 18 soon.

Author's Response: Thank-you Sieanna :D I am so glad you liked it!

I've already started ch 8, so hopefully within the week ;) *crosses fingers*

Reviewer: ebbingnight Signed [Report This]
Date: 12/03/10 - 01:41 am Title: Chapter 7

I'm a little surprised that Erestor even suspects that he may have these feelings: it's not as though his "experience" with Mórivo was anything other than painful and shameful. It's almost as though he's blaming himself as the victim (which, psychologically, isn't that unusual, come to think of it.) Interesting chapter: anxious to see more!

Author's Response: Thank-you for reviewing ebbingnight :D

I'm a little surprised that Erestor even suspects that he may have these feelings

that's a very good point. And I think normally he would not be aware of his less then normal desires -normal for the Noldorian culture I mean. I see the Noldor as more conservative then say the Silvian in matters of sexuality. But I actually think it was *because* of his experiences with Mórivo that he's even thinking this way. If he had never met Mórivo or been abused by him he may not even be aware of attractions between males.

He's a 38 year old elf, which I believe translates into a 14-15 year old human, so his body would already be awakening and under normal circumstances he would have been looking at others with a new awareness, he might have even shared his first kiss ;) But his experience with Mórivo set him off all forms of sexuality until he had utterly repressed it until now. He's very confused, but you're right his experience with Mórivo was utterly painful and shameful, yet it was the only sexual experience he's had :(

But now that he's facing his fears where Mórivo and what he did to him are concerned, hopefully he'll begin to experience the healthier and realer side of his sexuality. -That's not to say I am going to have chapters and chapters addressing that :D After this next chapter -and Green elves!- there's a bit of a time jump so a lot of that happens in the background, though I shouldn't say to much since I've not written that far lol!

OK, no more hints :) I do appreciate you're review, and thank-you for bringing up a very important question :D

Reviewer: Laer Signed [Report This]
Date: 10/03/10 - 08:29 pm Title: Chapter 7

If I was Erestor and had this tramatic experiance I think I would be a bit less generous in my views with some. I am glad he has told his father. It will help him heal. :-)

Author's Response: Thank-you so much for reviewing :D

Erestor is, despite everything, a decent elf as we see in 'To be Black' he somehow manages to hold on to his better side through everything -and things certianly haven't finished being dark, there's still Doriath, and Sirion :( -but he hasn't forgiven Mórivo, I think that would have been to much to ask, he does however feel pity for him. Erestor knows what its like to lose a parent, and whatever Mórivo has done or is he lost his entire family in a matter of days :( That doesn't negate the terribly things Mórivo did, and more he wanted to do to Erestor. I just wanted to bring another side to him, no one is totally evil, we may never know what twisted Mórivo into the perverted brute he has become, but he wasn't always thus, he's still an person.

But your review has gotten me thinking about something..... for future chapters ;) So thank-you you again :D I had thought we had seen the last of Mórivo, but I wonder now??? Oh, the planing and plotting! My favorite part of writing ;)

Yes, I am glad Erestor has found some resolution with his father. He loves him deeply, he was the only family he had left after his mother died. I think Erestor's life would have been very different if Lalauro had indeed been born his sister :(

Reviewer: Spiced Wine Signed [Report This]
Date: 10/03/10 - 05:02 am Title: Chapter 7

Super chapter ! I am extremely glad Erestor and his father had a talk, and what happened at Himring came out.

Erestor has a good soul, as Míridhren said. He seems poised in that rather difficult situation (in a hierarchical) society, between nobility and commonality, but sees people for their own worth.

I am very much enjoying the explanations and the lifting aside of the *pages* so to speak, to see into these peoples lives. There is terrible sorrow in the Noldors' past and you show that well, but you also know how to balance that with hope in the form of resolve in their spirits, and with innocent little Lalaruo.

Well done!

Author's Response: Oh, I am so glad you liked it :D

I was a little nervous about MORE sexual tensions... but it only seemed natural that Erestor would be experiencing conflicting thoughts when it came to his own repressed sexuality. He is in his teenage years so to speak, and those are hard enough with out all the rest.

He seems poised in that rather difficult situation (in a hierarchical) society, between nobility and commonality, but sees people for their own worth.

I am so glad you think so :D Yes, class is another issue I wanted to address in the story. I think there were as many poor underclass elves, as there were humans. Maybe no one was starving, but its a bit harder to die from starvation when you're an elf. I like reading stories about the 'under class' elves so to speak -though I love me those elf lords as well lol! But class and hierarchy are more issues that are largely ignored, and that bring out more of the realness of elves lives. So I am delighted to hear you thought it turned out well :D

There is terrible sorrow in the Noldors' past and you show that well, but you also know how to balance that with hope in the form of resolve in their spirits, and with innocent little Lalaruo.

Wow! Thank-you I take that as a huge complement :D To be able to get into the real sorrow of the Noldor's history. Its so deep, and there are so many unforeseen repercussions. As Míridhren said, duty has a price, we better be ready to pay it! Unfortunately the duty to revenge their murdered king, the duty to follow Feanor/Fingolfin and their sons cost so much more then they could have imagined in their darkest dreams :(

Reviewer: Laer Signed [Report This]
Date: 05/03/10 - 12:14 am Title: Chapter 6

You go not so little Erestor! I am glad he stopped before he killed him... It would have made him just as evil as the other one...

Author's Response: Thank-you for the review :D

Sorry, I think I forgot to message you about the new chapter :( I will next time.

Yes, I couldn't have Erestor committing a kinslaying ahead of schedule -oh poor Erestor still has lots of bad stuff ahead :( -but I am glad he overcame his fury and the drive for revenge too. I think killing or taking any kind of physical revenge upon Mórivo probably would have destroyed Erestor :(

Reviewer: Sieanna Signed [Report This]
Date: 03/03/10 - 03:36 pm Title: Prologue

wow, what a great chapter...and I can't even believe his father witnessed it all; Please Update ch 7 soon:) ARe you posting the other 2 New Stories in this site or on FF.net?

Author's Response: Oh thank-you for reviewing Sieanna! I am so glad you're still enjoying the story! And you opened an account here! Awesome :D

Yes, we'll just have to wait and see exactly what his father all saw, and what he'll make of it. He can be a hard man, but he does love his son under all that. He has a hard past himself though. He followed his lord's out of Valinor, is a kinslayer, and has endured the loss of his wife. He wants Erestor to be everything he was not, yet exactly what he tells him to be. And Erestor is very devoted to his father, and has spend his whole life trying to please someone who was already hardened to near coldness by his past :( Not a good situation, but I hope they can come to an understanding.

I'll post all my work here for sure, but it will really depend on the rating and content for weather I post it on FFN or not. I plan on posting "Shadow of the Past" there for sure, but as you know I stopped posting this story there after ch 3. I'll post "Shadow of the Past" since so many people are reading it there, but it will no doubt get a mature rating unlike Black which only got a teen. I am not sure how much sexuality it will contain or violence. But I'll be sure to let you know :D

Oh ch 7 :) I haven't started writing yet, but I've got a good layout in my head already. Actually I should probably be starting writing now... yep I should get on that lol! Hopefully I'll get it up within the week ;)

Reviewer: Spiced Wine Signed [Report This]
Date: 03/03/10 - 04:54 am Title: Chapter 6

Wow - wonderful chapter. I love the gritty realism with which you depict the aftermath of the Nirnaeth Arnoediad so that it seeps through everything you write in this and former chapters. Lalauro is a touch of innocent brightness after all that death and sorrow and she contrasts incredibly with Mórivo, who seems to represent a lot of Erestor's doubts and perceived *weaknesses* which he has now discarded by facing the man, who did turn out to be a coward.
(Gorgeous picture though. Pity he is such a worm!)

Another excellent job! :)

Author's Response: Thank-you for reviewing Siân :) I am happy the reality of the Nirnaeth Arnoediad's aftermath came across well. I realized while I was writing it that I haven't really read anything much on the lives of the sons of Feanor's people after the Nirnaeth Arnoediad, but then one doesn't see much on the lives of less well known elves during the First Age at all. There is a beautiful story by tinni 'Whispering Wind' about the wife of Caranthir that touches upon the sons’ of Feanor’s dispossessed existence living with the green elves. Have you read it? It's terribly sad, and exquisitely beautiful. But there are so many yet unexplored corners of history and realms of Middle Earth that are yet to be written about. Which is exiting for the fandom for no matter how much Tolkien fanfiction is written there will always be more stories to tell! :D

I am so pleased you liked Lalauro! Yet another OC, but as you will see in future chapters, we are only seeing the beginnings of yet another tale Tolkien only hinted upon and left us to explore :D You make a good point about her being the opposite of Mórivo. She is the potential for good in ever elf, just as Mórivo is a prime example of the potential for evil. Yet, no person is so uncomplicated as that, I have been thinking about Mórivo’s redeeming qualities -if he even has any :( Oh, how differently so many things could have been if only he'd waiting for a more mature Erestor to seduce lol! Though I don't think he was to interested in the seduction, he likes destroying innocence far too much for that :(

Yes, Mórivo did represent many of Erestor's 'weaknesses' he turned out to be the coward in the end, and Erestor holding all the hidden strength. Though I think it was not so much hidden for others as it was from himself.

I am glad you liked the pic! He is scrumptious isn't he? It almost makes me want to give him an alternative ending, but we'll see. Sometime a person falls into evil and never rises again :(

Reviewer: Laer Signed [Report This]
Date: 26/02/10 - 09:21 pm Title: Chapter 5

This is so very well done, I am glad he is no longer a small child but I do hope he does not have to protect himself against Morivo.
Maybe that excuse of an elf Morivo, will trip and die from his own sword. (Bet they wouldn't have to do much work to turn him into an orc)

Author's Response: Maybe that excuse of an elf Morivo, will trip and die from his own sword.

LOL!!! hahaha that had me caking up :D He certainly has many orc like qualities, the brute!

Thank-you for the review. I am relieved he's no longer a child as well. I kept on getting irrationally angry at him for not beating the crap out of Morivo lol! I think they still need some closer, but I am hoping Erestor will end up being the bigger man so to speak. He shouldn't have to live a life tortured by nightmares :( But he can't sink to revenge on Morivo's level either. The next chapter is turning out to be quite a character growth one for Erestor :D

Reviewer: ebbingnight Signed [Report This]
Date: 26/02/10 - 01:38 am Title: Chapter 5

Ah, this chapter is a bit easier to take, as it no longer involves Erestor as such a young boy. I hope that he finds the strength and maturity to deal with all the problems that are so obviously at hand.

And what has happened to Lindir? I want to hear more of the Green Elves!

You're doing an amazing job of storytelling, in case you weren't already aware. :)

Author's Response: Oh, I am glad you enjoyed this chapter more :D I am actually quite relieved I am done writing a young Erestor. I didn't expect it to be so hard to write a child, but it was. I kept on getting mad at him for not acting more mature lol! I am hoping for some definite character growth, or the revelation of character growth in the next chapter.

Oh Lindir? Well we haven't seen the last of him, but he's still several chapters in the future... he might make a reappearance at a certain high-kings court ;)

Green elves are a yes! I think they are far too over looked in Silm writing :(

Thank-you again for the kind words, and I am happy to hear you're still enjoying the story :D

Reviewer: Spiced Wine Signed [Report This]
Date: 25/02/10 - 05:03 am Title: Chapter 5

Another rich chapter. Erestor has definitely grown here, his *voice* is older, but he still bears scars, and that is some terrific writing.
So, Mórivo may still be a problem? Let us see how Erestor handles it being older.

Well done!

Author's Response: Thank-you for the review! I was defiantly trying for a more mature voice, so I am glad it turned out. Even though he’s still young for an elf at 38, he's had to mature very fast, as I imagined many First Age elves had to.

Yes, I felt Erestor needed more closure with Mórivo. He can't go on living his life in fear, and unjustified shame. He also has a very low opinion of himself, if you've noticed, something he carries even into the Third Age when he speaks to Jaden of his crimes in "To be Black" but he does need a bit more respect for himself I think :D Mórivo and his twin worked to take that away from him, make him feel like a coward, and he needs to reclaim what's been taken. I am excited to write next chapter, it should be good :D

Reviewer: ebbingnight Signed [Report This]
Date: 21/02/10 - 08:37 pm Title: Chapter 4

I am disliking this more and more with each chapter, but in a way that speaks to your skill as an author, I think. The bullying, racism, and sexualized cruelty here is becoming increasingly real, and therefore harder to read without revulsion, particularly as your Erestor and Lindir come across as very normal youngsters more or less trapped in this extremely hostile environment.

Author's Response: Thank-you for your honesty ebbingnight. I understand where you’re coming from, it is a hard read, even darker then I had originally envisioned. I will say things will be getting a less dark (I hope :D) but then, I haven't even gotten the kinslayings.

" particularly as your Erestor and Lindir come across as very normal youngsters more or less trapped in this extremely hostile environment."

Yes, that sums up where they are perfectly. It’s hard to imagine a happy childhood raised in the mists of murderers:( Yet, they are not alone, and while I imagine such an environment could twist the physic of a person (the twins being good examples of this, growing up in the heart of a hate and revenge fueled court) it can also refine a person bringing forth their inner beauty. Either way Erestor's past lingers with him for many years to come.

Thank-you again for the review. I do hope you will continue reading even with the graphic raw nature the story has taken :( I haven't started writing ch 5 yet, but I am hoping for a less dark one :D

Reviewer: Spiced Wine Signed [Report This]
Date: 21/02/10 - 07:40 am Title: Chapter 4

Wow, this was a brutal, hot chapter.
The complexity of your OC's is a great strength in a fanfic author, and the ability to make them blend seamlessly into Tolkien's world.

This chapter continues to have the very gritty realism of your previous ones. I simply love that, moving completely away from the overdone 'we're-all-mates-here' Elves that I read about so much in the Third Age. The First Age Elves were *human* and even Tolkien says they are *human* as in a branch of the human race, and therefore subject to all the emotions Men are; they can be cruel and vicious (and that's canon) and you've brought a great *ground level* realism to this story.

I have an idea about who found him, but if I am wrong, sorry, I spent hours yesterday working on podcasts and emails for the IBS site and am exhausted.

If Maglor and Irimë are married, then their son Glorfindel is both of the House of Fingolfin and the House of Fëanor, which as a heritage for Glorfindel I really like - and what a combination! Finwion twice over! Glorfindel deserves an illustrious heritage.

Mórivo gets a slap from my Fëanor for insulting him. (this is purely your character, not you, lol. You write the OC's brilliantly) I was commenting on a thread of Oshun's on LJ (she writes superb Finwion drama) about 'Fëanor hate'. Fëanor had *something* or his sons would not have 'straightaway' followed him without consultation. One of my own reasons for writing of him is to explore his charisma and to (one day) have his revenge for the cruelty of the Doom.

But anyway, love the raw energy in this, and I understand all Erestor's emotions, even his beating Lindir, and his horror. You have written that extraordinarily well. Mórivo was unexpectedly hot and kinky, although I think Erestor is as yet too young to appreciate such *games*, lol.

Author's Response: Oh! Thank-you Sian! I really needed that review. This chapter was not only a hard write, but a hard post as well. I'd like to say it doesn't matter if the chapters are received well, but I am only human and couldn't help my nervousness that people would hate it :(

I am going to send you a message in LJ about the Glorfindel as Maglor and Irimë's child....

Mórivo gets two slaps from me 1. for being a brute! 2. for dissing on your Fëanor :D Unfortunately he’s unaffected (damn those messed up elves!) But Fëanor has to admit he was rather rash separating himself from his army, getting killed ect. Though good luck getting him to admit it :D Especially your Fëanor, he wouldn't even admit there was something wrong with getting it on with Morgoth lol! Had to show him whose boss after all!

I am relieved the Lindir abuse scene came across well. It was the last part of the chapter I wrote. I knew what had to happen, but it took a awhile for the inspiration of how to get there to come.

"Mórivo was unexpectedly hot and kinky, although I think Erestor is as yet too young to appreciate such *games*, lol."

*grins* I am glad you think it hot! That wasn't my goal, but it's a plus ;) But poor little Erestor wasn't ready for any of that, and had a rather bad time :( I somehow don't see him getting kinky with Jaden, don't think it stuck, but who knows.... (Oh, gods! I can't believe my mind just went in that direction with them, somehow it just seem wrong lol!)

Thanks again for the review, and kind words :D I’ll let you know about Glorfindel, its a long explanation :D

Reviewer: Laer Signed [Report This]
Date: 20/02/10 - 08:43 pm Title: Prologue

Poor little boy :( Glad he got away before something a whole lot worse happened to him!

Author's Response: Thanks for the review Laer :D Yes, I am glad he's found some good elves, interesting those good elves happen to be kinslayers! I've always thought all the bad character elves conjugated with the Feanorian's and the sons of Feanor just took them in because they needed warriors.

I think things might be looking up for little Erestor! :D

Reviewer: Spiced Wine Signed [Report This]
Date: 18/02/10 - 09:20 am Title: Chapter 3

I am sorry about your PC troubles!

This is a great chapter. I love reading an 'outsider's' (in a sense, as Erestor is young) of the Noldor, of Maedhros' court, of the younger elements and how they view things - the whole chiaroscuro of thoughts, emotions told from his perspective. I really enjoy stories that tell the First Age from the *inside*, and make the characters, both OC and canon, so real. You are certainly on a roll with this ! For purely selfish reasons, I hope your pc problems are sorted out soon.

Author's Response: Thank-you for the review :D

"You are certainly on a roll with this ! For purely selfish reasons, I hope your pc problems are sorted out soon."

Yes, I am hoping everything works out to! I am lucky enough to have a university where I can checkout a lab top for free!! That's great for writing this weekend until I get a new one :P

I am happy to hear you're enjoying the story! I finished ch 4 yesterday, then reread it all last night and suffered from the intense desire to tear it up, shred it, and then burn it! I thought Erestor came across as a whiny little bitch lol! But after nearly tearing my hair out in frustration, I went over it again did some editing, and told myself "He's only a child, and its called character growth." Well, I hope he gets some balls soon, my brother likened him to Eragon from well "Eragon" I nearly swore off writing right then!!! If I ever write such an annoying character I'll die of shame lol.

So, enough of my rambles, and thank-you again for the review, it really meant a lot to hear you liked Erestor after the chaotic night I had yesterday :D

Reviewer: Laer Signed [Report This]
Date: 14/02/10 - 02:07 am Title: Chapter 2

As I said elsewhere..Run little Erestor...RUN!

Author's Response: OOH! I am so glad you found the story on this site Laer, and thank-you for another review :)) I'll take it you don't mind reading an R fic, so I think I'll only post here from now on. Things get quite dark for little Erestor next chapter :( I don't think it would be appreciated by most FFN readers :( Though I may send a redirection here, I'd hate for anyone whose interested to not be able to follow :)

Thanks again for the review!!!! Yes, Run Erestor!!!

*hugs*

Reviewer: Laer Signed [Report This]
Date: 14/02/10 - 01:56 am Title: Prologue

Poor little Erestor. So much hanging over his little head already. :(

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