Reviews For Maid of the May
You must login (register) to review.
Reviewer: Ria Signed [Report This]
Date: 17/05/11 - 10:34 pm Title: Three Songs

I have two word-choice issues with this section. Both "megaphone" and "irradiated" sounded uncomfortably modern. I know that speaking horns of some sort are a fairly ancient technology, but the word megaphone conjures something electrical for me, and irradiated, while it has the original meaning of "made radiant", has really been overwhelmed by the sense of "made radioactive".

And I love your story!

Author's Response: Thanks for the feedback Ria! So glad you enjoyed. I had my doubts about "megaphone" myself, but didn't know what else to call it, and I figured surely one would be needed; how else would a hobbit make himself heard in such a crowd? "Speaking horn" just might work. Thanks for the suggestion! As for "irradiated" I never thought of it in association with radioactivity; to me it just means, as you said, made radiant or lighted up. I'll think it over about whether to change it or let it stand. Thanks once more! ~~~~~{~@

Reviewer: Ria Signed [Report This]
Date: 17/05/11 - 10:25 pm Title: Two Plans

I love the tone of your story -- a little bit reminiscent of P.G. Wodehouse, in a less frenetically funny mode. Very evocative, to me of the English country life that he so often shows. I also like the throwaway references or foreshadowings to things that appear in Tolkien, especially "Every worm has his weak place," and the way you opened the story with the legend of the walking trees (which I believe someone mentions in the shire somewhere in Fellowship, yes?, so it is an old Shire tale).

Author's Response: Thanks for commenting Ria! Yes, I came across that saying while trying to find out something about Bungo, and thought it might be a good fit. And the bit about the walking trees seemed a good way to open it and introduce Gandalf through the eyes of a tipsy villager. Not sure if I've read any Wodehouse--I think I have, but it's been a while. I'm strongly tempted to check him out. Thanks once more! ~~~~~{~@

You must login (register) to review.