Wonderful! I have just begun reading this story. Though u left me confused lol..i thought surely the hero would be Legolas, and i see u picked up where u left. Legolas is married to rhavaniel :) i eagerly await more of this fine story
Author's Response: luthien, oh it's so good to hear from you. Hope all is well for you. It's been so long. Well, as you can see, I'm taking a chance with this one, writing oc's instead of canon, but I'm really having a great time doing it. Yes, Legolas and Rhav are married now after a long relationship. Other characters from Taming the Wild will find their way here also, though I don't know if you've read it yet. Well, one might think Legolas would have been her hero, but you know me, gotta keep you guessing. Some things never change. I hope you'll continue to read this. There is so much more to come and one very hot OMC elf too. Thanks for reviewing. It's always good to see you here.
I really like Rosloch and Lindiel. Such genuine, kind hearted people. I like your descriptions of the city. We must think alot alike because my visions of it are very similar to yours.
The whole description of the interior of the house tells me alot about Lindiel, probably more than if you would have just said "the house was neat and tidy." I gleen alot about her through those details.
It's kind of a relief that Terr trusts Ros. And I'm still sad that she lost her butterfly. :(
Author's Response: Rosloch and Lindiel are good people and I hope to give them stories of their own some day. Isn't it funny how personal we as writers get with all our characters, even the second and sometimes third ranked (I guess that's what you could call them)? Taldred knew what he was doing when he handed Ter over to Ros. He would not trust her to just anyone. I had fun describing the house. I think it is the most I've put into something like that before. I put on some mood music and I was off and running with it. I'm glad you see Minas Tirith the same. Hey, great minds think alike right? lol
That was a close one! You're so very good at writing these action sequences and just keeping the flow going. Lots of interesting threads to weave together too. Hopefully her luck will change when she reaches Gondor.
Author's Response: I'm very glad you are enjoying this story. I'm really having a great time with this one, more than any other. Sorry for taking so long to get back to your other reviews, but I was on vacation and in a place where internet was not good and sometimes nonexistent. I haven't written in almost 2 weeks and my fingers are twitching with ideas. Thanks for reviewing.
How lucky she was to have a protector for a few years, and a safe home. But now she's on her own, I hope she'll be safe. Somehow I doubt that though. ;)
Author's Response: She had the right influences when they were most needed during her young life. Alric was not only a father figure. He taught her what she needed to know to survive.
Oo! What an intersting development! I always like the tension you build in stories. Tension is one of those things that's had to define in words, but when you feel it, you know what it is.
That's kind of sad that she lost the flutterby. It meant so much to her... I hope she will get it back.
I like the name you called the Haradrim leader. Shadow man almost sounds like some kind of fallen super hero or something. lol
This is so interesting I always look foward to a new update. Actually, it kind of made my day considering how rude one of my writing group memebers was last night... Make me wish I could be in a writing class with more people like you! You know, those who are creative and open minded and write because we have a passion for our characters, the craft and the human condition and not psuedo intellecdtuals who look down there nose at unsophisticated romance writers. Let's all give ourselves a pat on the back!!
Author's Response: Haha!! I never thought of it like that. Shadow man, I guess it is kind of fallen hero-ish. Well, I'm glad I could cheer you up. You know, real writers write from the heart. Screw rules. Everyone needs romance. Everyone wants to feel their heart pound in their chest when two people realize they love each other. Our characters are more than just a name, more than just letters on a page. They are real to us. We love them, we want to protect them, we want them to shine and make others feel good. I think you are right. We all deserve some credit for what we do. It's not easy, frustrating at times, but we do it because we have to. Just like music, there are all kinds, classical, jazz, rock and roll, heavy metal death punk (whatever). But it is all music and it is how we express ourselves. One is not better than the other and anyone that thinks that way is shallow. I'd much rather read you than many published authors who are supposed to be best of the best. We romance writers gotta stick together.
You know, I don't usually read fanfics with all oc's as the main pairing, but I'm sure you'll tell an intricate, passionate tale here, as you usually do. Whatever her journey will bring I'm sure it will have more bumps and rocky paths than not. Compelling beginning!
Author's Response: I understand that you and many other's don't give oc stories a second thought. I have been that way myself in the past. However, after reading a couple stories like that, I have come to realize that there is a whole other side to fanfiction and I enjoy reading oc's, sometimes more than canon. Anyways, thanks for giving it a try. I'm very proud of my characters in this one and it is fun coming up with new personalities.
I have not been able to keep up with my reviews lately as I would like, but I just had to step in here and say I am so very glad Duchess has confirmed what I have been telling you all along. You are a natural and an amazingly gifted artist. You delight me every single day if you send me a paragraph or I get to read another glorious chapter. I don't know when I have ever enjoyed a friendship more. You are as strong as your characters and twice as enchanting and it is such a thrill to watch you come into your own. Love you always, Candy
Author's Response: I know, I know . . . you always tell me this and I will say it proudly. You were right. You know how it is. It's difficult to see yourself and your writing the way other's do. I think everyone should have someone like you, someone to share with, bounce ideas off of, constant support. None of this would be the same without you. As I told Duchess below, you are a great help to me whether you will admit it or not. I've never had a better friend. Love you too, Moe
I'm playing catch up with the past few chapters. Her attack wasn't unexpected but the end result was to me. I'm looking forward to more chapters!
Author's Response: Thank you for following along. There are many more chapters to come. I'm always glad to see a review from you. I originally had many worse things happen to Terrwyn, but I just didn't feel right about it. The end result here was how it had to be and I'm happy your were still surprised. More to come.
Honey, this is what storytelling is. You have the storytelling natural abiltiy. How long have I been reading your stuff now? A little while and I can see the progression in your style and your voice. I think your voice is becoming stronger and more confident. This chapter was a great example of showing rather than telling. You've got some good descripters in here... he shot down the ladder... said in a more serious tone... and there were other ones. Just by adding a a different action word, you totally change the tone and how I picture the scene.
Did you make up that story about the Whispering wood? If so it was great. That's what's great about fiction...eh... i'll just make some shit up and just roll with it, you know!! And that whole paragraph where he describes what Minas Tirith is like is wonderful, really setting us up for what you envision the city like and from a first hand account through Rosloch instead of just the narrator telling the reader.
Personally, I love supporting characters. They can make a mediocre story great... Look at some tv shows. And I love to know their stories too! I mean, they are real people, or at least we should treat them like real people instead of just cardboard cutouts. So, yah, I like that you told us a bit about Rosloch. He's so much more three dementional that way.
One thing you are excellent at is creating believable, real, flawed characters with yearning. There's a lot of good stories out there with good storylines or plots and uninteresting people just sort of playing their parts. It never seems like you play god with your people; forcing them to do something they don't want to do.
I've said before, whatever "it" is... I think you have it. and the only way you will be a better storyteller is to keep writing!!
Very good job!
I was on DG's website and found this link really interesting. Was good and helped me understand things from a different perspective so i'll post it here if you want to read it.
got to other projects and click on Cannibal's Art. It's really good
Author's Response: Sorry for taking so long to respond, but I am still on vacation. If you want to know where, look at my bio, lol. If you read the review above from Lisse, she tells me this all the time. So to here you say these things too just makes me feel doubly good. Her encouragement and support have a lot to do with my advancement (though she would say no), and so have you. Your reviews have helped me so much and your reading suggestion also. So I just have to say thank you for your constant support. Now, as far as the Whispering Wood, I found as much info on Firien Wood as I could and found a mention of the close growing trees by the Mearing stream. It really was nicknamed the Whispering Wood because of this. I also found that the beacon-wardens lived in huts in the trees, but no description of them. That part I envisioned the best I could. I'm glad Rosloch is growing on you. He will play an important part for a short while. As far as my other characters, main or secondary, they are all important to me. They all have a voice and if they are important enough to mention them in a story, they should be as real as they need to be to push the story forward. I also went to the website you suggested and loved what she says. I don't know how, but everything she said seems just naturally the way it should be when writing. I was so excited to see that because I just love DG. If I could write like anyone, it would be her. I also see her influence in your writing as well. I don't think I'll ever stop writing. It is a part of me, too deeply embedded in my blood to stop now. And with friends like you and Lisse to keep pushing me forward, it makes this even more satisfying. Thank you so much.
Ugh! The tension here is tangible. I got a little tight in the throat here at the end. If there's one thing I hate, it's manufactured tension between characters. You know, when the author tells you there's tension between the characters, but you just can't feel it. Dude, you can write pages and pages of flowery prose, but if I can't feel the tension, the emotions of a character, you've got nothing.
Poor Taldred. Such a genuinely good man. Seriously, I don't think guys like him exist anymore. (Maybe I'm just cynical, but I don't think many real men exist in our culture anymore. Call me crazy but Emo's are not attractive)It must be hard for both of them knowing they will likely never see each other again, you know. It's nice that she allows him that one kiss and that it's given willingly, without regret or any undo pressure.
You've set the scene here really well. The place, the people, thier relationships. Rosloch...eh, he's just a typical guy. NOt a bad guy, but just maybe lacking female companionship. I suppose so, being all alone up there for so long.
Your last paragraph here is an excellent summary and transition into what one might call Part Two.
You're a very good writer and storyteller. Whatever the "it" is that makes a good writer, you have it. Creativity, prolific, lots of different ideas, you have perspective, which I think is the most important quality ar writer can possess. You're able to convey thoughts and feeling and capture the readers attention. DRag the reader in to feel what the characters are feeling.
I enjoyed this chapter, especially your use of showing versus telling. It seems every story, every chapter, you keep getting better.
You really kick these out don't you!
Have a good weekend!
Author's Response: You're not the only one that was pulling for these two, but Terrwyn would never give something away unless it came from the heart. I think Taldred knows this. He just couldn't let her leave without making his feelings known. You might be right about men today. Society has changed much over the decades and maybe none of us are the same anymore. As for Rosloch, I hope you give him a chance. You are correct that he is not a bad guy. He's just lived his life a certain way for a long time and enjoys it. Thank you so much for all your comments and know that I take everything to tell me into account. You have a great weekend too.
Uh! This is such a lovely story! Taldred is the perfect gentleman that every girl wants! You should really write a story centered around him. I do feel sorry for him cause he really does like her, she just doesn't feel the same in return. He is a true friend though and understands her dreams and desires.
This really was a nicely written chapter. Just enough description so I can see the movie going on in my head with out getting bogged down inthe minutia. You've done good varying your sentences wordings so everyone doesn't start He or She. Maybe some foreshadowing? You keep moving the story forward, wanting to make me read more right now! If this were a book, I don't know if I could put it down. I always look forward to reading the next post!
Author's Response: As I told Lisse, I think there is a story within a story here with Taldred. I really enjoy writing his kind of character and I kind of feel I owe it to him to have his story told. I'm so glad the descriptions and wording seems to be working. One thing that has influenced me is the book you recommended. Love her writing and I'm learning a lot by reading it. It's taken me a while to read, but with summer in full swing, my kid home for summer vacation and my writing time greatly limited, I've been able to catch up on my reading. It would be a dream to be able to write like her. Thanks for your recommendations. I never knew how inspiring it would be.
I am enjoying reading this so far. Although I have not reviewed until now is not because I did not want to, but that I have been extremely busy trying to study for a coming math test. I am trying to get into college this year and need to pass my math. I am suppose to get a student loan, if I pass this test. Wish me luck. But in the meantime please keep up with this wonderful story. I like to read when I take a break from this school stuff and yours helps me relax a lot, besides being a great read. Another one slotted to my "Favorites."
Author's Response: Thanks regaliaria and good luck and best wishes on that test. Sounds like an important one and the fact that you took the time to read my story is satisfaction enough. I really appreciate your support ever since my first story and especially being you were my very first reviewer . . . ever.
Wow a very exciting chapter as they all are. Taldred! Yum!! You really need, or I should say, I really need you to add a Taldred chapter to your untamed series and lets see what is under that armor. I am so glad this site is back up. I would have withdrawals if there were no place for exciting real fan fic such as yours. For me all the OC’s really work. I have said it before and will again, your OC’s become so real so quickly. For me it’s the little details you add that make this so great, make all your work great. For instance, you describe the long dirty fingers that are choking her. That says so much. He is noble, but lives the life of a common thief, and or just does not like soap. Anyway, there is more to like here than just that.
Your leading lady is a smart one, and very sweet as well. One thing that struck me anew was her willingness to trust and be affectionate and grateful even though she has had a difficult life.
Author's Response: Thanks so much. All of these characters, and the ones to come, have really come to life in my mind and if the reader feels that too, then I know I'm going in the right direction. I love Taldred too, and if a certain upcoming elf character would share the spotlight, I think I could get the armor off that Rohan hotty.
I like this Taldred. He seems like a good guy and a loyal friend. Sort of pig headed like I imagine Rohirric men might be.
I like Terrwyn. She's resourceful and she's got skills!
You do a good job of advancing the story line. This is a really unique idea!
Author's Response: Taldred has really grown on me too. Terrwyn is lucky to have someone like him to watch out for her. And he just adores her. Terrwyn is slowly coming into her own. As I write, I get to know her better and I hope the reader will too. She is no wimp and when the situation becomes difficult she can cowgirl up. But like any young girl, she is looking for love. Still, she will not go with just anyone. She is looking for someone special, someone worth giving her heart to. I'm glad you like how things are going so far. Lots more to come.
Yay! I'm so excited for another of your stories! I'm very interested so far and I'll be watching for updates.
Author's Response: Hello again AmberRoseEm. It is so nice to see you again and I'm very happy to have you along on another adventure. As you can see, I'm trying something different here. I was a little worried about people responding to a story like this, so it is nice to see a familiar face/reviewer. I truly hope I don't disappoint.
Of course she wouldn't just take the jewels and marry Taldred (I hope I got his name right). Then she would be a boring nobody like the rest of us. I just hope she doesn't come to too much harm.
Author's Response: Yes, you got the name right. Poor Taldred, he would make a wonderful husband and not to mention young and good looking, but then where's the fun in that. Besides, he'll be alright. I've got other plans for him. Terrwyn has too many adventures to experience yet before she settles down, and somewhere out there is an elf waiting for a feisty red head. Thanks for the review!
I read once in one of my "How to write romance" books that you can't be afraid to do terrible things to your characters. I thought "oh okay, not so tough. I can do that." But it's really really a hard thing to do. Now, I'm not a big fan of the "rape fantasy" (I just don't see how a woman falls in love with a man who does that to her, or why anyone would find rape or sexual violence against women as a turn on)but in uncivilized times (or even in modern times)sexual violence against women was how men excerted thier dominance; it was used to humiliate, exploit, manipulate. Therefore I think it is very realistic in this situation.
Sometimes ambitious men (well, mostly men) will do anything to gain power, or wealth or influence even if it means betraying their own country. And clearly, there were men who did not possess the Rohirrim's social or cultural values; Grima, Grima's father, Fengel, these men here in the last scene.
You've got some really good dialouge here. I think some of the best dialouge you've written. Natural, flowing, very much like normal speaking. And I liked that paragraph describing the men. And really?! You write the best cliff hangers! It really doesn make me want to read the next chapter like, right now!
Author's Response: I agree with you here. I don't understand the rape fantasy idea. It is not a turn on in the least, as far as I'm concerned. And doing bad things to our characters, or putting them in harms way is difficult. I get very personal with my o.c.'s and I find that I want to protect them. But the fact is, things like this happened back then and still happen to this day. The difference is, it was dealt with differently then. Women were easier to use and a lot of the time nothing would be done about it. Thank you for your comments about the dialog, and yes, I have been accused of being a tease with the cliff hangers in the past. Actually, while originally writing this chapter, it was getting a little too long and I had to cut it in half. So it ended up like this, a cliffy. You don't know how much I want to post more than once a week. I have always posted at about a 5 day range. But I want to keep far enough ahead so that posting doesn't catch up to writing.