This was hilarious; I don't watch many Disney movies, so I don't know if this is quite true to form, but it definitely amused me. It's funny to think about what would happen if they tried to "adapt" my fanfic.
Sure, it's an AU where Sauron's a good guy, and the first chapter does begin with a rescue, but it's hardly G-rated. ;D
Ai Elbereth, Gilthoniel!!!!! I am scarred, scarred for life, precious! My funeral is at three forty-seven if you wish to come. :D Lorian
Author's Response: I'd better not--your mourners might recognize me as your murderer and tear me to shreds.
Umm...Boromir born evil, that is really bad! Poor, poor Boromir.
Then, of course Disney would cut Saruman would be cut from the movie, that is just to mant evil wizards, as you mentioned eariler.
Then, going through the mines as a 'short-cut' whew, that is terrible, no one in their right mind would go through the mines, except Frodo, but he doesn't really count here, does he?
Author's Response: Well, Frodo only decided to go through the mines after it was clear the climb up Caradhras failed, so Frodo wouldn't want to go through the mines anyway. Poor Boromir is right; pity Suethors portray him this way all the time.
It is getting better/worse. Umm... you know what I mean don't you? Anyhow, Aragorn and his *tights* made me think of a picture someone made meant for humor that I saw on the internet one day, this caused me to look it up. I will include the link and the quote so you can find it and see it if you wish!
"Gondor has no pants
Gondor needs no pants!"
Oh boy, there goes Boromir again!
Author's Response: Oh, yes, I remember that! It's from Bakshi's Lord of the Rings cartoon from the 1970s. Have you seen that version? I've heard it's generally more faithful to the book than Jackson's version, but that the animation is so bad it's laughable.
AHHH!!! That is absoutly 'terrible', of course I guess that is where you are trying to get this to go to. I hope that Disney will never make a movie of Lord of the Rings, because you are right, they would do a terrible job of making it. I also feel that Peter Jackson and New Line did a fine job of making LOTR, for they at least stick to the story, most of the way, because it is nearly impossible to stick to the story 100%. Thank you for pointing out to us how poorly Disney would do on making LOTR if they choose to do so.
Author's Response: You're welcome. I really have fun horrifying people with these things!
Oh... Kay. Yes, the movies could have been a lot worse, but I do like them. Thank goodness Disney hasn't done a lotr movie. OMG, can you imagine someone twisting and turning all of the plot! That would be just unbearable! :D Anyway this is a very funny if somewhat thought-provoking story. Just brill!
Author's Response: Thanks. I like the movies too, but I wouldn't have liked them if they'd been like this.
"I think my readers need a break from the sheer horror."
Not so much from the horror as from the side-splitting laughter, jules14...
Author's Response: Well, I´m glad you thought it was funny. Thanks for the review.
lol i read most of this in one go. i conmend you on your humour and all the references to disney movies. i have to admit i love disney(in certain moods) and adore lord of the rings but i would die if they were ever mixed. the old cartoon versions were ba enough i only managed about half an hour of them before having to turn them off.
made my day this and thanks for writing
Author's Response: That's the way I feel. I'll always love certain Disney movies, but some stories are just never meant to be Disney-fied.
I'm not sure whether to laugh, cry, or lose my lunch. It's fabulous, yet extremely nauseating. (Description of Aragorn sounds really familiar for some reason...)
Author's Response: I admit I got the "hawk-nosed Indian" description from Bakshi's animated version of Aragorn, so that's probably why it seems so familiar.
I didn't know wether to laugh or cry...
the sad thing is, that it would probably turn out like this where Disney to get their hands on the copywrite
Author's Response: I console myself with the thought that if they did, I could sue them for stealing my idea.
I can't believe I've been so out of it that I missed reading this as soon as you updated. It's a great finish to a very clever (and fiendishly believable) parody.
Author's Response: Thank you. I just hope it's not so believable that Disney comes across it!
That was funny! I actually like Disney, though. To me, it's very sweet, and I love Beauty and the Beast.
That said, I do have nightmares of what they'd do if they did LOTR, Les Miserables, or Phantom of the Opera. LotR would basically be like what you just wrote. In Phantom, they'd turn Erik's deep character into one of those cliche villains, or worse, pull a Phangirl and make RAOUL the evil one and Erik Mr. Nice Fluffy Not-insane Not-Creepy Not-Dangerous-at-all. Ugh. And Les Mis...they'd make Javert evil, and give Valjean and Cosette a singing kitty, and they'd probably put Eponine and Enjorlas together, and make the Les Amis win. GAH!
Hmmm....maybe I should write a fic like this for Phantom of the Opera.
Author's Response: I'd definitely read it. You're probably right about what they'd do to it and Les Mis: poor Javert would be evil, Marius would be a brave, strong warrior and not the rather wimpy little bourgeois boy he was in the book, Valjean couldn't be a convict, because that's a bad influence on little kids...ugh.rnrnI like most of the old Disney movies that I remember from childhood: "Beauty and the Beast," "The Lion King," "Aladdin," "101 Dalmatians," "The Little Mermaid." However, I agree that Disney needs to stay away from the classic novels ("Hunchback of Notre Dame," anyone?) and the mythology (look at what they did to Greek mythology in "Hercules"!).
LOL what a surprise ending!I laughed but am very glad Tolkien had other ideas!
Author's Response: Definitely. Very squicky ending as well...fortunately, I'm pretty sure Tolkien stated in a letter that he hated the Disney Company and definitely didn't want them getting their hands on his work.
Author's Response: Thank you!