Penname: jules14 [Contact] Real name:
Member Since: 20/11/06
Membership status: Member
Bio:

[Report This]
Reviews by jules14
Summary: Elrondā€™s 101 gorgeous daughters happens to Middle Earth. At once. Anything man-like, be it elf, dwarf or... well, man, would do anything to obey them. The whole world gets OOC. In despair, or in some cases, out of boredom, the characters you know travel towards Rivendell. Will they manage to save the world before it is too late? Or are they all doomed?
Categories: Movie-verse
Characters: Elrond, Original Character
Genres: Humor, Parody
Warnings: AU (alternate universe)
Series: None
Chapters: 5 Table of Contents
Completed: Yes Word count: 12025 Read Count: 3691
[Report This] Published: 05/10/04 Updated: 08/10/04
Reviewer: jules14 Signed
Date: 07/05/08 Title: Chapter 5: The scouring of Rivendell

Very funny. Too bad that the Sues still exist in the minds of the fangirls.

Summary: No plot outside tumbling dear sweet Elrond into bed.
Categories: Movie-verse
Characters: Elrond
Genres: Erotica, Romance
Warnings: Graphic Sex
Series: None
Chapters: 1 Table of Contents
Completed: No Word count: 2823 Read Count: 1700
[Report This] Published: 12/10/04 Updated: 12/10/04
Reviewer: jules14 Signed
Date: 04/06/08 Title: Chapter 1: How the Moon Wooed the Stars

Er...you do realize that Elrond is still married to Celebrian, don't you? She sailed for the Undying Lands to receive mental healing, not to divorce her husband.

I'd actually be interested to read about how Celebrian reacts when she finds out that Elrond committed adultery with Mary Sue, but I doubt you'll write it.

Summary: A lovely romance that totally makes sense and definitely could have happened.
Categories: Lord of the Rings Slash
Characters: The Fellowship
Genres: Parody
Warnings: AU (alternate universe), Slash (same sex pairing)
Series: None
Chapters: 2 Table of Contents
Completed: No Word count: 1254 Read Count: 3973
[Report This] Published: 04/07/06 Updated: 04/07/06
Reviewer: jules14 Signed
Date: 02/12/06 Title: Chapter 2: Chess

I like this; it definitely makes me chuckle. I hate all those slash pairings that make absolutely no sense.

Summary:

After the end of the Third Age many thought that evil had been defeated forever from Middle-earth.Yet in the darkness of secrecy Sauron begot a son with one of the Eldar, one called Elenion Caunardhon, that ever sought to avenge the overthrow of his father.


 

As the days of Arda near their end and the situation worsens in our world, a young Tolkien fan is allowed by the Valar to be brought to Middle-earth and be part of a conflict to save Arda from destruction at the hand of Sauron's Son... and perhaps his own world...

This story covers a timeline that leads up to and includes the Dagor Dagorath...


Categories: Book-verse
Characters: Aragorn, Arathorn, Aredhel, Arien, Arwen, Aule, Balrog, Barahir of Ithilien, Beleg, Beren, Bilbo, Blue Wizards, Boromir, Caranthir, Celeborn, Celebrķan, Celebrimbor, Celegorm, Cirdan, Curufin, Dior, Earendil, Earwen, Eldarion, Elendil, Elladan, Elrohir, Elrond, Elros, Elwing, Eomer, Eomund, Eonwe, Eorl, Eowyn, Erendis, Eru / Iluvatar, Faramir, Feanor, Finarfin, Fingolfin, Fingon, Finrod, Finwe, Frodo, Galadriel, Gandalf / Olorin, Gil-Galad, Gildor, Gimli, Glorfindel, Goldberry, Gwaihir, Huan, Idril, Indis, Ingwė, Irmo / Lorien, Isildur, Landroval, Legolas, Lśthien Tinśviel, Maedhros, Maglor, Manwe, Melian, Mķriel, Morgoth / Melkor, Mouth of Sauron, Namo / Mandos
Genres: Action/Adventure, Drama, Fantasy, Poetry, Romance
Warnings: Violence
Series: None
Chapters: 100 Table of Contents
Completed: Yes Word count: 146334 Read Count: 92283
[Report This] Published: 06/12/06 Updated: 05/02/10
Reviewer: jules14 Signed
Date: 06/12/06 Title: Chapter 1: Introductions

Oh, I'm intrigued about what's going to happen next! Continue!

Author's Response: Thank you!! I will do my best!! Check on Saturday for chapter 2

Summary: Shadow Ranger pokes fun at Mary Sues.
Categories: Movie-verse
Characters: Bill the Pony, Butterbur, Celeborn, Denethor, Elladan, Elrohir, Elrond, Erestor, Galadriel, Glorfindel, Gollum, Haldir, Orcs/Uruk-Hai, Original Character, Saruman, Sauron, The Fellowship, Tom Bombadil, Treebeard
Genres: Action/Adventure, Horror, Humor, Parody, Romance
Warnings: AU (alternate universe), Character Death
Series: None
Chapters: 5 Table of Contents
Completed: No Word count: 2931 Read Count: 8370
[Report This] Published: 30/01/07 Updated: 19/02/07
Reviewer: jules14 Signed
Date: 19/02/07 Title: Chapter 1: Oh dear, it's bad from the start...

I'm sorry, I found out I can't MST this fic, with one major reason: it's actually GOOD. So besides when the characters agreed with your comments, their riffs were just plain boring.

You'll have to make this story a lot worse...add some terrible grammar and a LOT of canon-raping and sappy romance for it to be MSTed.

Author's Response: I\'ll do the even worse version later

Summary: This is a look at how Radagast, a natural choice as a spy, adds his part to the work of the White Council. It's inspired by ideas found Jules14's story "The Sue That Wouldn't Die".
Categories: Book-verse
Characters: Orcs/Uruk-Hai, Radagast
Genres: Humor
Warnings: AU (alternate universe)
Challenges: Not Another Elf Fic
Series: Sillier Stories, The Affairs of Wizards, Saturday's Children
Chapters: 1 Table of Contents
Completed: Yes Word count: 916 Read Count: 1811
[Report This] Published: 04/03/07 Updated: 04/03/07
Reviewer: jules14 Signed
Date: 06/03/07 Title: Chapter 1: Gorgoroth Local 151: A Tale of Subtle Sabotage Starring Radagast the Brown

Ha! That WAS funny. Who'd have thought Radagast would be such an excellent spy?

Author's Response: He's a master of changes of hue, and almost completely Mary-Sue proof, you know.

Summary: Response to "A Salute to Jules" challenge by Ria, if I tell you which one, it'll ruin the surprise. Suggested slash, if you believe all orcs are the same sex.
Categories: Book-verse, Book Verse Slash
Characters: Orcs/Uruk-Hai
Genres: Humor, Romance
Warnings: Slash (same sex pairing)
Series: None
Chapters: 1 Table of Contents
Completed: Yes Word count: 863 Read Count: 1697
[Report This] Published: 24/03/07 Updated: 24/03/07
Reviewer: jules14 Signed
Date: 24/03/07 Title: Chapter 1: Happy Birthday Shagrat!

Hahaha! That's great. Love how with orcs, "puppy dog eyes" are literal.

Author's Response: I can\'t wait for your next installment. One of the substitutes has GOT to be an Elf . . . but which Elf? Great cliffhanger.

Thanks for the review!

Summary: Sauron deals with an orc strike. Done for two challenges: Salute to Jules and the 666 words. Enjoy. Jules, you are the best!

Note: The actual text is really 666 words. The Disclaimer bumped it up a bit.
Categories: Off Topic
Characters: Sauron
Genres: Humor, Parody
Warnings: AU (alternate universe)
Series: Monty Python's Flying...Nazgul?
Chapters: 1 Table of Contents
Completed: Yes Word count: 693 Read Count: 1788
[Report This] Published: 01/05/07 Updated: 01/05/07
Reviewer: jules14 Signed
Date: 03/05/07 Title: Chapter 1: The Orc Strike.

This is awesome. Believe me, I laughed hysterically at this. YOU'RE the best, Araiona.

Author's Response: Haha, really? You liked it? Yay! :) No, you\'re way better. :) There\'s no way I would be able to write the riffs you write for the MST3K series. You totally rock. :)

Lembas by AraionaDuBois Rated: PG [Reviews - 2]
Summary: A spoof based on the Spam sketch from Monty Pythons Flying Circus. Just random silliness.
Categories: Off Topic
Characters: The Fellowship
Genres: Humor, Parody
Warnings: AU (alternate universe)
Series: Monty Python's Flying...Nazgul?
Chapters: 1 Table of Contents
Completed: Yes Word count: 555 Read Count: 1268
[Report This] Published: 09/05/07 Updated: 09/05/07
Reviewer: jules14 Signed
Date: 11/11/07 Title: Chapter 1: Lembas

Hilarious. I can actually picture this.

Summary: A poem about the Sues of LOTR.
Categories: Off Topic
Characters: None
Genres: Poetry
Warnings: None
Series: None
Chapters: 1 Table of Contents
Completed: Yes Word count: 844 Read Count: 1316
[Report This] Published: 09/11/07 Updated: 09/11/07
Reviewer: jules14 Signed
Date: 09/11/07 Title: Chapter 1: Chapter 1

Thank you for writing this poem. It perfectly sums up everything I feel about Sues.

Author's Response: I\'m glad you like it!

Family Court by Ria Rated: PG [Reviews - 4]
Summary: Because I have a drabbly mind, this Mary Sue parody slipped in. How are all of Legolas' Mary Sue wives going to resolve their claims?
Categories: Movie-verse
Characters: Namo / Mandos, Original Character
Genres: Parody
Warnings: AU (alternate universe)
Series: Sillier Stories
Chapters: 2 Table of Contents
Completed: Yes Word count: 637 Read Count: 2677
[Report This] Published: 28/01/08 Updated: 17/02/09
Reviewer: jules14 Signed
Date: 28/01/08 Title: Chapter 1: A Bad Day at the Ring of Doom

Oh, if only your drabble turned out true. I especially loved the "crystal tear"...that cliche is used in EVERY Suefic.

Author's Response: Heh -- I added that in the last edit. I\'m glad that it adds the right touch.

The Awakening by Formegil Rated: PG-13 [Reviews - 8]
Summary: An Orc flees from the Battle of Morannon after Sauron's downfall. He hides, but is found by someone...
Categories: Book-verse
Characters: Orcs/Uruk-Hai, Original Character
Genres: General
Warnings: Character Death
Series: None
Chapters: 8 Table of Contents
Completed: Yes Word count: 12513 Read Count: 9951
[Report This] Published: 06/04/08 Updated: 08/04/08
Reviewer: jules14 Signed
Date: 07/04/08 Title: Chapter 6: Chapter 6: Origins

Wow. This is really thought-provoking. I would never have thought of Eru speaking directly to an orc, but I like the idea. I also feel sorry for Grishapat. I never thought how the orcs would react if they ever learned the truth about their origins, but Grishapat's horror is quite understandable. I can't wait to read the rest.

Author's Response: Thanks for reading. I know that the dialogue in Chapter 2 is a bit far-fetched, but if you want an Orc to get \"redeemed\", something quite dramatic must happen. This idea has been in my mind quite a long time. I don\'t have any strictly canonical basis for this, but I thought it possible, if not probable. By the way, it\'s good to know I\'m obviously not ending up in your Mystery Fanfic Theatre.

Reviewer: jules14 Signed
Date: 08/04/08 Title: Chapter 8: Chapter 8: The Parting

A very bittersweet ending. I am glad that Grishapat was redeemed. I wonder if his form will change now, like in his dream.

Author's Response: As for the ending, I thought this was the most logical way to handle it, sort of inevitable. When I got this idea for my story, I searched in several fanfic sites if anybody had already done it and if there was anything to say still. I found one story about an Orc renouncing evil and read it (I don\'t remember the site\'s name anymore). The Orc\'s name was something like Kalikali (I think), he was converted by Frodo and Radagast (!), and became the bodyguard of queen Arwen. After Arwen died in Lorien, the Orc married a stunted and tortured elf-girl and moved to the Shire. There he made friends with Sam\'s grandchildren and repelled the invasion of power-hungry elves. And then all lived hapily ever after. No kidding, this story really exists! After reading this, I decided that there definitely were still something to say (although I enjoyed the story in a twisted way). I almost wrote an epilogue to my story, where Carfin would stand at Grishapat\'s grave years afterwards, but decided to avoid any excessive cheese and decided to cut the narrative shorter.

Summary: This story is written as a response to the challenge "A Salute to Jules". An elvish polka band performs at King Thranduil's begetting day party. The story is set around the year 2720 T.A. I don't exactly know in which category this should go, so I picked book-verse. Rated PG for alcohol consumption, just to be on the safe side.
Categories: Book-verse
Characters: Original Character, Thranduil
Genres: Humor
Warnings: AU (alternate universe)
Series: None
Chapters: 1 Table of Contents
Completed: Yes Word count: 2100 Read Count: 1492
[Report This] Published: 13/04/08 Updated: 13/04/08
Reviewer: jules14 Signed
Date: 13/04/08 Title: Chapter 1: The Singsong Sindar

I really enjoyed this. I especially loved the part about the gig in Moria and the orc fans! It was also hilarious to read about a smashed Thranduil; not many fanfic authors write about the wood-elves after they've had their Dorwinion wine.

Author's Response: Thanks for reviewing! Well, my story is not as bad as \"The Hobbit\", in that two Elves actually pass out. I wonder if Elves do have a hangover after boozing...

Summary: Aedil and his elvish polka band on tour in Middle-Earth. Can they struggle their way through sappy lyrics, bad contracts and enthusiastic fangirls? And most importantly, do they get anything but sore feet from their journey to fame? A sequel to The Singsong Sindar.
Categories: Book-verse
Characters: Ecthelion, Gandalf / Olorin, Nazgūl, Orcs/Uruk-Hai, Original Character, Other Canon Character
Genres: Humor
Warnings: AU (alternate universe)
Series: None
Chapters: 5 Table of Contents
Completed: Yes Word count: 13159 Read Count: 4756
[Report This] Published: 14/04/08 Updated: 18/04/08
Reviewer: jules14 Signed
Date: 18/04/08 Title: Chapter 4: Chapter 4: The Beautiful Menace

This is a very funny story. I especially liked the orc fangirls (I can just imagine them!) and Gandalf killing the Mary Sue. It was creepy how much the Sue was like Rosa from "An Elf's Love"! I can't wait to read about when they get to Minas Tirith.

Author's Response: Thanks! Actually the resemblance is intentional. I read yesterday a few chapters of \"Middle-Earth\'s Last Hope\" and got a good laugh. I checked also another Mary Sue-story from the list \"The Worst of the Worst\" on the ff.net. The \"heroine\" was described having a \"thick waterfall of hair\". So Calamarydhilirosia is a mix of these two, and the one Sue with a magic fox. The song I translated was eerily fitting to be sung to a Sue by our heroes. By the way, I actually meant the story to end here, but now it seems best to end it with the Minas Tirith. More yodel coming!

Prometheus Unbound by carfaxabi Rated: PG-13 [Reviews - 2]
Summary: Reflections of a much tortured elf.
Categories: Book-verse
Characters: Legolas, Other Canon Character
Genres: Humor, Parody
Warnings: AU (alternate universe), Torture
Series: None
Chapters: 1 Table of Contents
Completed: Yes Word count: 618 Read Count: 1096
[Report This] Published: 05/06/08 Updated: 05/06/08
Reviewer: jules14 Signed
Date: 05/06/08 Title: Chapter 1: Chapter 1

Wonderful. This fic was the perfect antidote to all those sickening, sappy, tortured!wimpy!Legolas-hurt-comfort stories.

Author's Response: Thank you! Would you believe this was a little piece came from an idea that I originally conceived back in 1980 for Star Wars Hurt Comfort fic? But it fit LOTR so well I decided to write it with Legolas in mind.

Summary: I think the title explains it all.
Categories: Off Topic
Characters: Aragorn, Arwen, Asfaloth, Bilbo, Boromir, Celeborn, Celebrķan, Eldarion, Elladan, Elrohir, Elrond, Galadriel, Haldir, Merry, Nazgūl, Other Canon Character, Sam, Saruman, Sauron, The Fellowship, Witch King
Genres: Action/Adventure, Drama, Fantasy, General, Humor, Mystery, Other, Parody, Romance
Warnings: None
Series: None
Chapters: 34 Table of Contents
Completed: No Word count: 13470 Read Count: 34476
[Report This] Published: 09/01/09 Updated: 21/06/10
Reviewer: jules14 Signed
Date: 22/01/09 Title: Chapter 22: Entry 22

This is a very fun piece. It actually brings me back to my teenage years--boredom, secret crushes, angst, etc. Moreover, it is quite believable. Good job.

Author's Response: Thank you! I'm glad you like the story!

Summary: JRR Tolkien sees Peter Jackson's adaption. He and I sit down to watch the first movie together. Despite my attemps to make a good impression, somehow I think he might be utterly annoyed and disturbed.
Categories: Movie-verse, Off Topic
Characters: None
Genres: General, Humor, Other, Parody
Warnings: AU (alternate universe)
Series: None
Chapters: 3 Table of Contents
Completed: Yes Word count: 3870 Read Count: 2779
[Report This] Published: 08/10/09 Updated: 30/10/09
Reviewer: jules14 Signed
Date: 12/10/09 Title: Chapter 2: The Fellowship of the Ring: Part Two

Now, as curious as I am about Tolkien's reaction to Jackson's films, I'm not sure I'd want to be in the same room while he was watching them--that could be pretty awkward. You're braver than I am, and I'm looking forward to reading more.

Author's Response: Ah, it's downright nerve-racking to be in the same room with him! I'll be updating sometimes soon. -Fay