I honestly thought they would see her changed into a orc, even though I thought that would take longer - until I saw the breasts and the rest. Had Melkor read what we read now, he would kick himself at not having '' by slow arts of cruelty '' ( cruel to us anyway! ) created the race of Mary Sue's. Those fice inch heels could have done a lot of damage at the Dagor Nirnaeth, except that naturally the Noldor would have been too busy drooling with lust at the legions of tottering, long haired, smirking MS's to lift a sword. Well, that kind of sword anyway. ( Why does that make me think of those nurses in the Silent Hill games? )
'' Fingon, er.. Gothmog, he's right behind you! Oh valar you're going to die, you are so dead, oh sh**e... ''. '' Eh...? Wha...? '' Responds a hypnotised Fingon. '' But they're so .. so... gorgeous...''
Missed the boat there, Melkor, never mind, next time, eh? Oh what are the 111's? Is that just peole getting too lazy to press the shift key and typing 1's instead of exclamation marks? I have to ask, as I see it a lot and that's all I can think of.
Author's Response: The 111\'s are from people who type so many exclamation points that they accidently lift up the Shift key while doing so.\r\n\r\nIs it okay if I use your idea for the Dagor Nirnaeth?
I still love how I thought this was serious right up to the point where her hair was gold streaked d;-). - well the red could have been blood, I have a morbid imagination . I was truly expecting to see a female orc ( as they do breed, unfortunately so do MS's. A female orc would appeal to my OC's more, I reckon ). After reading the MS parodies you wrote, I did think; '' I wonder if Jules 14 writes serious stories. '' And I did think this was. Yes, use the Dagor Nirnaeth bit, if you did not get my message. Seeing the Noldor collectively as a '' drooling, witless pile of lust '' is something I hope NEVER to see on a so-called serious fic, I would completely implode with fury. Please don't tell me any-one has done a Silm based MS ( Oh, well, me, but it was 15 years ago, and no-one fell in love with her, far as I can remember no-one even fancied her. ) But it's something I would like to see you write. I don't know how many MS's you must have exposed yourself to, you brave person. Still, I'd love to see that written as a parody.
Author's Response: Actually, \"The Search for Middle-earth\" is serious--or it\'s supposed to be--but I\'m about to do some serious revision on it. Thankfully no one has done a Silm MS, as far as I know, but since all these LOTR Sues have to come from somewhere, what better source than Morgoth?
So that is why there are so many of them with amazing powers. d:-) that explains it all and I am still glad I've never found one in Beleriand since the Silmarillion is too hard for their glittery pink brain-cell to grasp [ Thank Eru ]. You do realize you just made Utumno far more ominous and terrible than the hints in the Silm, with those Mary Sue's, and I didn't think that was possible. Great. Just great!
Author's Response: Thanks. I\'m terribly glad there are so few Silmarillion Sues; I hope the Silmarillion never gets made into a movie.
Oh brilliant. I love the way they sound so authentic even though they are speaking about Sue's - and a wahter-slaid on Taniquetil. >_
Author's Response: Thank you.
Hello, Dae. Well, first I have to say, I could not write two words in another language, so well done. You could use a beta, for some of the mistakes, which believe me, even English speakers make. And they have no excuse. This sentence: ' She *run* to the beautiful maiden who was sitting not far away, gazing thoughtfully *to* nothing...' , should be she ran and ' thoughtfully at nothing.' You should use speech marks to indicate conversation, I have seen only one ( published ) book written as you are writing it here, using - before some-one speaks, but it makes it more difficult for the reader to follow. If you want to send me that chapter and let me send it back to you back with those corrections shown in bold italics or something, I am more than happy to. If it pleases you to leave it as it is, no worries. I must say I am always impressed when some-one who is ESL writes, since again, I could not even say '' hello '' in your native tongue, and I hope you will continue to write, but if you need any pointers, let me know. The mistakes are easily made and as easily corrected. Take care.
Author's Response: Thank you for the review! And for your advices. I\'ll try to follow them. As I said I\'m new here and there are many things I need to learn (rating for example, for I did it only by intuition). I\'ll try to be more careful.
I enjoyed this so much, the comradeship, and the realism, I am not surprised it reads as authentically as it does if it is based on a true experience; and how marvellously you took that and set it into Middle-earth. Super. :)
Author's Response: Thanks for your most generous comments. My two characters have supporting roles in Arwen\'s Journey. I may include them in a couple of other short stories as well. My descriptions of the rangers\' appearances and methods might differ from those of J.R.R. Tolkien and Peter Jackson, but I\'m basing them on my personal military training and experiences. I see no reason why Ithilien rangers wouldn\'t, by the time of my stories, have evolved into something resembling contemporary army rangers. After all, Gondorian and Ithilien rangers had been fighting guerrilla campaigns against Orcs for centuries before Faramir or Aragorn took command of their own units.
I always love well writen stories like this. We read about what these characters do when they are grown, but it deepens them - to me - to have a glimpse into their childhoods. They weren't always warriors, after all. I so enjoyed this. Thanks! :)
Oh and I spent some time, while writing a [bad] bit of writing about Legolas wondering what the heck the Elves did with the carcases of any spiders they killed. They seem to big to just be left to rot, although nature would take care of it eventually, of course. I stared into space for about half an hour considering ( I get easily sidetracked by questions like '' Does Imladirs have plumbing? '' and '' If Elves can sleep, ' walking open eyed ' don't they run into things? '' ) So I liked the idea of dead spiders being disposed of like that. d;-)
Author's Response: You know, you\'re right. The spiders wouldn\'t eat the corpses, and it doesn\'t seem like Mirkwood has lots of other large predator/ scavengers . . . I think the material culture questions are the most interesting. My guess is that Rivendell has gravity-powered plumbing, sited as it is, and an elegant grey water drainage system.
Lol, great ending. I have to say I am amazed at the way some people can write a one-shot and yet fill it with character and description and bring it to life .[ I read one by Nieriel Raina a couple of days ago and another by Jael, a Nativity ] All were oneshot's and yet they're so bursting with, well, flavor [ Like a really juice mince pie, keeping to a festive theme! ] It's definitely a talent to do this sort of thing so well. Terrific.
I will review, as I like slash, and I'm not afraid to own up. d;-). I thought this was hot. I enjoyed it a lot, and what made me laugh - not at the way you wrote it, it just tickled me - was '' Cheeky little minx. '' I just love it. I kept smiling about it and I was writing my last chapter and almost had one of my characters say that to another one, it was just stuck in my mind. I caught myself in time, because that would be plaguerising you, [ and I realized that and laughed because I'd been grinnng at the words and mental image and was near as dammit typing it into something. ] but it just fits, it is indeed very cheeky and sexy. I think you should continue .
Author's Response: If you want to borrow \"Cheeky little minx\" you have my permission and blessing - I\'ve heard it used loads of times\r\nbefore and COULD NOT pass up this opputunity to use it. XD I love this fic too, I\'m quite proud of myself! \r\nXD Yay, let all the slash lovers come out of the closet! \r\n
In the light of this, Sian places an order for her birthday present. [1st week Feb] with Gemini_Elf: A VanimůrŽ or Elgalad and any other character slashfic. d:-) . [ Okay, only joking, but I'd rather like to see you write one. ]
Author's Response: O.O Wow! I\'d be honoured! Just expect it sometime in May XD Jokes! Seriously, I\'d love to *Plot bunnies begin to\r\nspawn*
Oh, I do like that, very much! Now, gosh, it reminds me of something in a collection of poems which I wil have to find, the style I mean. I will have to find it and tell you.
Author's Response: Thanks again, xFanarix. I bet your poetry is good.
Disclaimer: I do not own LOTR and I do not make any profit from writing this work of fiction.
Genres: Angst, Drama
Warnings: First Draft, Torture, Violence
Series: Eternal Mellyn
Chapters: 1 Table of Contents
Completed: Yes Word count: 297 Read Count: 2340
I really like the pain in this , well by '' like '', I mean I can feel it, it sounds so real. I'm sorry that a RL situation prompted it, but that is how writing usually gets '' deeper '', it's not easy to write about things we have never experienced. If you've lost some-one you love, then you [ any writer ] can write about grief and not just write. '' She was so upset, she cried for a long time. ''. They do say that no-one under 35 should try and write a novel and expect it to be published, since before then life hasn't pummelled a person enough. I think that's rubbish, myself, as I've read some great stuff by much younger people, but I understand the premise behind it. Usually a reader can tell if the writer has really gone through the things they write of, grief, hate, love, terror, a relationship, etc [ though some people are just very talented and can somehow write it and never have experienced any, it's rare though. ] So although it's horrible to go through things, it enriches the writing and gives it a realism and depth people can relate to. So while this is blazing with hate and despair, I love it as it's so recognizable as being from the heart.
Author's Response: Strange...I wrote a good Nazgul scene the other day, and no-one\'s ever tried to make me evil >.<\r\nMaybe that\'s why I\'m struggling with that love scene, I\'ve never been in that sitaution, and I don\'t read stuff\r\nlike it, because I don\'t overly like it.\r\nhey, how come you and I can write slash then? LOL! Ok, well, my answer would be I\'ve read WAY too much ;)\r\nThanks for reviewing!
Who is the Elf who is going to get it, or is he just random for the story? Or is there a story behind that story? I can write slash because I find it sexy, I don't want to read it, since I live it. If I worked in a shoe-shop would I want to read and visit shoe shops in my spare time? Well, no not unless I had some sort of shoe fetish. Besides, I was extremely miffed to find all the romantic novels I read in my teens were all totally wrong and men were nothing like they were portrayed in the books. I was so mislead. Lol. I overdid the sweet romance, saucy romance and erotic romance, and I won't look at it now, it does nothing for me. Slash is always written with more passion, for some reason. And again, sorry that this was founded on something real, but it's a good way of purging things, actually. Better than actually going out and killing some-one, yes. Although I know how you feel, I've longed sometimes to have a torture chamber in the cellar which I don't have either. I'm not going to tell you to write more, but it's very interesting to imagine what is behind this.
Author's Response: There\'s a whole story (Practically a novel...) behind this story. The people he\'s been betrayed by; the woman\r\ncomes BEFORE all of my other fics. Remember Nymph saying in the last chapter of Chains \"Dark elf bitch?\" that\r\nwas a direct reference to his dark elf who broke Elladan\'s heart. The friend is a friend of Elladan\'s who betrayed all\r\nof the Elves because of money...inspired by Allan A Dale from BBC\'s Robin Hood. And the son is a son of Elladan\'s\r\nfriend who killed his father *Zips mouth* As I said, it\'s after all my other fics >.< But I will write more!\r\nTrue, I wouldn\'t wanna write about schools. They SUCK. Can\'t wait till I\'m OUT and in the world! \r\nlol, I know guys are *insert swearword of your choice here* there\'s not a single guy I\'m blood related to who is reliable\r\nand the boyfriends I\'ve had were pretty...*swearword* Except the one who has now turned out to be bi >.< Plus\r\nnow he\'s a better friend.\r\nYeah, it was this or kill someone. Not that I COULD kill her, she\'s too strong, but I would still fight (heh, I\'m\r\npretty stupid when it comes to anger) \r\nYou\'ll see more when I post one of the fics...sorry, still got a way to go yet! Finish Chains, and its sequel; \"Under\r\nthe leaves of Mirkwood\" Then I MAY write a prequel involving the \"Dark elf bitch\" as Niphredil calls her, or I\r\nmay just skip straight to the story concerning this fic. Whatever. I\'ll decide when the time comes.
Ah yes, the Dark Elf. This sounds as if it is going to be a traumatic, dark and intriguing story! When I said I would not ask you to write more, I meant '' Don't write more if this was just to purge your anger and writing any more would be upsetting ''. But I am really glad it is going to be incorporated into a story. The way you plan ahead amazes me, I can't plan what to buy in the local supermarket. I really look forward to the story!
Author's Response: Ah, well, when it comes to shopping I\'m all over the place. But I get bored out of my skull at school and home,\r\nso I end up daydreaming ahead! Fun, especially for the fic this is based on *Hugs* I\'m gonna do my best to\r\nget everything done so I can work on it!
You don't have to put Earth is a different world, Soulwriter, Tolkien said it was this one, 6-9,000 years ago, so it is just a different time. I like the fact that you have bothered with a prologue, you've begun with canon characters and not - er popular ones, shall we say; you have been descriptive and taken your time with these less than glowing beings, which is great. I will always think that is Sauron wanted an ultimate weapon [ in the form of a person ] he would try and enslave an Elf warrior, torturing them as Morgoth did before the First Age, trying to corrupt and enslave them [ although he did not have the power Morgoth did ] or Aragorn himself. I really do not think, given how women were portrayed in Tolkien's universe, that it would be a female. Galadriel was the most powerful female of the Age, and her powers were defensive and protective, not aggressive. However, I am sure you know this and I will be interested to see how this develops. Take care. Happy writing! Oh, p.s. You have set this as a Round Robin, did you mean to have other people contribute, as you seemed to state that you had the story pretty much mapped out on your own.
Author's Response: Thanks for your ideas and review, I really do appreciate it! In the story the human will actually be transported from Earth (Middle Earth in the future) to the past in Middle Earth. It will be Sauron\'s mistake thinking that Earth is an entirely different world. The next few chapters will reveal all that stuff in detail. Thanks again! =]
I started reading this late last night, but never had time for a review. It's very interesting, since you seem to have grown through the fan-girl Legolas stage and matured a great deal through your writing. But you're obviously a spiritually more aware person than many fanfic authors anyway, it comes across in the way you speak of your test of faith. If it was a film character which helped you - why not, films should be useful for something other than just a visual feast. I enjoyed KOH, since I studied that time period for my first book, even before I read LOTR and wanted to see if the film had it's fact right. More was accurate than I had expected, except for the character of Balian. There was a real Balian d'Ibelin [ I'd even had him in my book as the cousin of a Templar who was a main character ] but he was not an ilegitimate blacksmith etc. I enjoyed it though and Balian's own struggle with the faith which told him without possibility of refusal that his poor wife was burning in hell. The Crusades remain one of my main interests after Tolkien and it's interesting to see how one man's struggle helped you, that it was not simply '' another '' Orlando film, but has aided you on many levels. Take care, happy writing!
Author's Response: Thanks for the review. I was interested in the Crusades before I even heard of KoH, so having Orlando in a Crusades movie was a great bonus. I remember I was excited about the film since the beginning of 2004. After seeing KoH, I went and researched the period, and found out about the real Balian of Ibelin. I can see why the film-makers fictionalized his character. Audiences wouldn't have enjoyed the real Balian as much, I think.
Wow! Beautiful and how strange, because before Christmas I was wondering how a story could be written having Ešrendil as the Star heralding the birth of Christ. The reference to Finarfin's son, is that from Atrabeth Finrod a Andreth? There was a suggestion there that Men would actually be the means by which Eru could enter Arda. Only Eru was strong enough to counteract all Melkor's evils, but could not Himself enter his Making in all his power without destroying it? Finrod saw that this redemption would come to pass through Men and also heal Men's past when they turned from listening to the first Voice to Melkor's? I must admit Atrabeth is one of the most fascinating and deep chapters of HoME that I have read, prophetic and hopeful and yet so sorrowful also. Thankyou for that, wrote what I have been thinking about these past couple of weeks!
I like that very much! It says a great deal about this young and confident man, and how the reality of what was indeed an accident, which is not that uncommon in war, changed his perspective. Well done.
Author's Response: Thanks very much, xFanarix. I had a few emotional issues to deal with when writing this one. Some of these original characters may appear again in later stories.
Well said, Anwyn, I think that old copy of LOTR was definitely meant to be read by you. My uncle bought home a copy of the Hobbit for me to read when I was in my early teens. For some reason, I said: '' Not yet. '' But when I left school I almost at once picked it up. I'm not ashamed to say that if I had got into Tolkien when I was going through my last two years of exams I would have not only failed all of them, but probably failed them by siting down and writing essays on Tolkien in every exam and would not have cared, either. I still have the edition my uncle gave me though it's now fallen to bits. It just waited until I could truly give it the time it needed. I think beginning on role play sites can be very helpful as a learning experience and can be used to delve into characters, which was what I did also, of course. As you said , sometimes you just have to ignore the kiddies playing '' dress up '' and use the board to grow your own character into maturity.
Author's Response: Thank you! I still have the edition my dad gave me though its in very much the same shape as your copy of the Hobbit, practically falling to bits, lol. A lot of my volumes are pre-loved from a store I found semi locally called Hannalora Henleys, Its an old house turned into a book store and Hannalora is an older lady with huge glasses who is really cute. I canít do this place any justice in words, but it has books three thick from floor to ceiling and every shelf is absolutely crammed with books, I can easily spend hours there just going through all the books and there is a corner where she puts anything Tolkien related and I have found quite a few treasures. It turns out, though I didnít know this the first few times I went there that it was actually my grandfathers favorite place to when he was alive as he used to work at a building about a block away from the house, and I would say about 75% of the Tolkien books I own have come from there. Itís like every time I got there its impossible to leave without another book because they *want* to be found and read. Though I probably stayed on them on entirely too long looking back now I think that the RPG sites were a great way to get my feet wet as far as character creation and story building and story on, and itís a great way to connect with other people who also love Tolkien though there are some people who seem contented to say on those sites indefinitely I could not though I do appreciate what I learned I had to move on to bigger stories where I wasnít so confined by concern of what I would write would upset the other people, who for the greater part wanted to get married and play house. I still feel that I have a ways to go writing wise but it all had to start somewhere.
You know, I've been thinking for ages I see no stories about Turin and then this comes. Although I think that tale makes me cry most of all the stories in the Silm I just about fell off my chair. [ I didn't notive the '' entirely silly '' note until after ] I just want to know, who was on the other end? d;-)
Author's Response: Well, this is Turin we\'re talking about: It was a wrong number. ;)